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death

9
renn
12-13-2002
06:04 AM ET (US)
Occasional lurker, just recently relurked, first time post.

Damn sorry to hear about Sekhmet. Some of the best still, quiet and calm moments of my life have spent with a feline flatmate.

Your story reminded me of coming home after a long weekend away to find Otis (large, cheerfully bumptious marmalade tom: think John Belushi in a fur coat) dead on our doorstop. Apparently he'd been hit by a car, crawled to the door and waited for us for a day while dying of internal bleeding.

But you're probably now OD'ing on mutual stories like this.

Anyway Sekhmet sounded like the best kind of Scots dame: Small, smart, tough, cute and staying up late until you got home, ready to box your ears.

PS. Really enjoying Tim Powers' 'Claim", thanks to your recommendation.
8
Charlie StrossPerson was signed in when posted
12-11-2002
07:45 AM ET (US)
Getting over it a bit.

I think we'll be going away after the weekend to visit family -- then haunting the local cat rescue shelters. Hopefully I'll be back to complaining about a hairy nuisance before the year is out ....

(I've discovered that it's strangely hard to type *without* an orange ergonomic liability lying across my wrists, snoring.)
7
Niall McAuley
12-10-2002
06:27 PM ET (US)
Sorry to hear about your cat, Charlie, but you gave her seven good years if I read you right, after adopting her. Many cats (and dogs) don't get that much.
6
Bec Gilchrist ( ^Bunny)
12-10-2002
03:27 PM ET (US)
I know you don't know me, but I know Jan from irc..she was telling me about your kitty, and I just wanted to say a little something to you. Having the compassion to love our little non-human companions is a gift that everyone should have. Some have it to a greater degree than others. I think there is no purer love than between humans and animal companions. They feel deeper, they sense more, they love unconditionally. And I know your life was better for having Sekhmet in it. The web page is so wonderful, and you will always have those pictures for lovely memories, I know it is hard now. I still cannot look at my dogs web page without crying, and he has been gone for 4 years. But it still makes me smile when i think of him and the happiness he brought to me in his short life of 13 years . take care and my thoughts go out to you .
5
Randy McDonald
12-10-2002
10:15 AM ET (US)
Hi. It's me, Randy McDonald from soc.history.what-if.

I feel for you, and you've my condolences; last month, my family's dog, Lady, died of kidney failure. It's never good when a pet suffers and dies, for the pet or for its human family.
4
Martin WissePerson was signed in when posted
12-10-2002
03:48 AM ET (US)
My condoleances.

It's probably not much consolance, but from what you described it doesn't seem that there was anything you could've done, even if you had been there.
3
Anna FDD
12-09-2002
09:16 AM ET (US)
I'm too sorry for words, really. I had a cat die on me the first time I left her with my parents to go on holiday - of cardiac infarction no less, too easy to translate into "a broken heart". I know about guilty feelings. Terry just got one of her coveted and rarely-awarded Gourmet Gold cans out of this.
2
Jan Goulding
07-15-2002
08:09 AM ET (US)
I think part of the problem lies with the "blood being thicker.." idea that family ties are more important than friendship. Hence a distant cousin, who has been out of the picture for years, has absolute control over what happens at the funeral, and the friends who have been an important part of life are cast out. If the family members who are making the arrangements are theists of any sort they will naturally impose their idea of spirituality over the event, which I suppose is understandable. At least Charlie and Feorag, weren;t in a position there the God-botherer could see that you were steadfastly no singing the hymn and getting the occassional glare as a result.

The best (if there can be such a thing) funeral I went to was my grandfather's. The funeral director, and her son personally contacted all the near family to ask us to let her have between half a page and a page of things we remembered most about him. This was given to the vicar who, put together with the other information he got when he visited us all. The result a 40 minute eulogy that had us rolling in the aisles. The vicar came to the funeral supper and gave genuine comfort in terms of as long as we had the memories my grandfather would still be with us as in life. My grandmother was so impressed with him that she arranged all her funeral affairs a month later with the condition that the same vicar hold the service.
1
Anna FDD
07-13-2002
07:51 AM ET (US)
I know the feeling. I had a similar experience, only much worse, when a good close gay friend of mine died. The priest went on at length about sin. I was so angry that I couldn't even cry. Much the same had happened - out of ignorance, not pointed cruelty I think - when my grandfather died. My grandfather was one of the most uncompromisingly, effortlessly moral persons I've had the good luck to know - all the eulogy was about hell and brimstone.
When my grandmother died I took the time to go and talk to the priest. This allowed him at least to mention the fact that she was into charity, even if all the other things I had to say about her apparently didn't make much of an impression.
I just hope when it comes my turn the unavoidable blah-blah will be done by somebody who won't offend and piss off the people who cared for me.

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