Welcome to the Agnes & Senga messageboards.

Haw Agnes,
The ed's jist telt me aboot oor new messageboards! A ken it's late, like, but a wis jist wantin tae git ma neb in here afore ye.
Git yer erse oan here, gal, and gies yer gossip!

(Oor Hamish wis no weel again, but a think it was oan acoont o they sausages... a shuid hae kent they wur too much in a wanner fur a wee mite lik him... aye! You got it! He wis stinkin oot baith ends again!)

Erchie's dain fine an a hiv stertit ma diet... AGAIN!!

http://www.agnesnsenga.co.uk

Edited by author 10-04-2005 09:28 AM
Haw Senga

Wid ye believe it but ah wiz gettin gie fed up tryin tae git well again. Bob will nip ma lugs aboot gettin oot o' ma bed like but ull no blether fur long. See thon buggers that are goan aboot ah tell ye, ah kid see thum far enough!
Um glad ye goat in touch though. Ah didnae ken if ye had thumbed it doon tae Wigtoon or no, ye ken whit a mean; thon festival. Wiz it guid? Yu'll need tae tell me who wiz there and aw the gossip!
Och um awa back tae bed, *hack, sneeze, choke* um no as weel as a thought :-(
Geeze a few days and ull be fair and dandy.
Take care pet,
Agnes.

here you Senga
Ah wiz doin a bit o' nebbin aroond the websites ah ken and yu'll never guess whit Senga. Thon Editor hus pit us doon as the Scottish Burds! Ah near wet masel' haen a look at tight clothes, did ye hae oanythin tae dae wi that hen???? Um fair itchin the noo.
Ah tell ye ull hae tae send ye a picture o' the nightie William bought Marion in the play Oor Wallace. Ah seen it the other night. It wiz fae guid. Ah took yer advice and wore Ma Tenna La**....it came in handy mind!

Agnes

Agnes, ma dearie,

The ed's aye kent we wur Scottish burds cos a telt hur that masel when a requestit the change o' title.
A tell ye, hen, a jist didnae like oni o' they weird types that wiz eskin efter us when the title she'd gied us cried us Palindromatic QUEENS o' Scotland!!!! Aye! Yur lucky they didnae catch up wae ye fur they wur a funny lot! A thocht oor Shug wis luikin fair braw in eez kilt an aw they wimmen oglin him an then a fun oot! They wur aw blokes!! Aye! Blokes in dresses!! That's when a fun oot there wis anither meanin fur 'Queens' an it isnae jist reserved fur royalty an yon place in America!

Hope yer chist's feelin better, hen. Git your Bob tae rub oan sum o' yon Vicks stuff an hae a wee hot toadie afore yer bed (you hae the toadie, no Bob), ye'll be richt as rain in a day or two if ye stay aff yer back. No that am insinuatin or nuthin! Am jist meanin that yer no wantin tae be flat oot oan accoonts o' keepin oni fluid aff yer lungs.

Take care,
Senga

Edited by author 10-05-2005 11:13 AM
LOL haw Senga

Ah feel a richt numpty so ah do, there ah wiz, readin that name Queen's and ah dinnae even think aboot THAT! Oh my Senga, ye werenae gettin pornostar letters wur ye? Ah wid hae ended ma sell if ah hud read that!
Aye well, back tae ma chist. Ah let Vick gie it a right goin oer and ah slept like a baby, see that stuff ah tell ye, it kin wurk wonders so it kin. Um no hackin up aw that stuff noo, but ull no git intae that since ah ken yer a bit delicate like, dinnae like aw the graphic details.
Bob wiz sayin he wiznae feelin aw that grand this mornin, bit ah sent him tae wurk sayin nuthin a guid blaw o' fresh air widnae cure. Ah kin be a hard faced so n so at times.
Here hen, did ye git doon tae Wigtoon? Ye didnae say. Mind you if ye did it wiz pourin doon aw weekend here and it's no the best in the rain, it's jist no the same is it. Loads o' book shops tae hide aw in mind.
A wee man came intae oor close the day and pits up a fur sale board believe it or no! Ah tell ye, who ever buys that hoose must need their bumps read! Ull keep ye posted aboot that wan, ah jist hope we git a guid lookin laddie that buys it, ull hae the shineiest windys in the close ah kin tell ye!
Hope yer doin grand pet,
Agnes.

Dear Agnes,

Am awfie gled tae hear yer chist has gotten that much better. Am jist waitin fur mine tae disappear, oan accoonts o' this here diet am oan the noo. It's a richt guid yin, mind you... a hiv drapped a stane in a fortnight, so a hiv! Ma troosers ur still girdit roon ma behouchie, mind ye, so am thinkin they must jist be wee made 16s.

Aye, we did gang doon tae the 'festival' but a tell ye... a ne'er seen nae festivities. Plenty o' motors an' folks draggin weans aboot and plenty o' they funny lookin wummin whit luik lik blokes; ye ken the types... short hair, sensible shoes an dungarees... but the rest wis aw mince fae where a wis staunin. A fiver here, a fiver there, a tenner here, three quid there an aw jist tae listen tae folks yakkin aboot thursels an thur books... then they still expected ye tae buy a bloody copy... like they couldnae hae gied us aw wan each fur payin tae listen tae thum yakkin in the furst place! Oor Erchie an masel went tae the poetry competition launch an aw... it wis fur free or else we wuidnae hae bothert. An ye ken whit? It isnae free tae enter that neither. This year's ferstival wisnae a patch oan last years but then we wurnae oan stall duty this year, wur we?

So tell me, hen, did ye hae a guid time at thon play ye wur seein in Stirlin?

An whit's this aboot a fur sale sign? Wan o' yer neebours hid actually bought thur cooncil hoose in that scheme o' yours? Thur aff thur heids if ye ask me. Oniway, keep yer een peelt an let me ken if it's onibody worthwhile movin intae yer block.

Gaggin fur gossip,

Senga

Furgoat tae pit the website details in again... here it is
http://www.agnesnsenga.co.uk

The ed says we need tae dae that tae show nebbie folks the way back oot ae these boards an we cannae furget the http:// pairt neither

Edited by author 10-08-2005 08:38 AM
Haw Senga

Hope yer grand and no diein o' malnutrition wae aw this dietin! Yu'll hae tae tell me whit diet yer oan, ah kid be daen the wan yer oan tae, since ma belly's hingin oer ma waist band. By tea time, um needin tae undo ma button and unzip ma jeans; Bob keeps oan aboot me bein near pornographic and um aye furgettin tae dae masel up when a go tae answer the front door. The wee laddie fae next door near past oot, seein ma belly near touchin the grund the other night! Aye, tell me whit wan yer oan hen.
Bob and ma neighbour Bessy went tae see thon Oor wallace. Whit a hoot! Ah tell ye hen, yu'll hae tae see it! It wiz funny and sad, traumatic and amazin. The actors were brilliant. Och, ah like findin oot aboot oor Scottish culture (no that ah hae oany culture mind) but since it's 700 hunner years since the Big Man, William Wallace wiz killed, we aw decided tae go.
That wummin, Gill Bastock did ah braw speech at the end and ah tell ye, ah wiz bubblin aboot hoo much it had meant tae her. The wummin sittin aside me hud tae borrow wan o' ma hankies. No that ah wanted it back like!
She had gone doon tae London and ah kid you not, she jist got an invite; louped on tae a bus oan her ain, goat a wee B&B and joined intae the whole event, not kennin oanywan! Then, she walked the 6 miles Wallace had been dragged through London. Whit a wummin, she wiz brave, ah couldnae hae done that Senga, all on ma tod? Could you Senga? Ah tell ye, William Wallace meant that much tae her. So in a nut shell, the whole thing wiz brilliant! Oh and by the way, she wiz oan the radio and the telly too. Didnae hear is or see it mind but, but somewan telt me like. U'll hae tae send ye ma programme so as ye kin see the actors. The wan who played the part of Alec; bloody hell Senga, he was drop dead gorgeous!
so back tae ma oan wee hoose and the ironin tae dae. In fact, if ah kin stretch up ah kin just see, aye, thurs folk havin a neb at the hoose that's up fur sale. Ah saw it in the paper yersterday and it says -o/o£ and that's it. Bloody hell hen, oor hoose must be worth nuthin! Bob near took a haert attack when he saw it! Ah kid buy it masel at that price. Wit dae ye think hen, a twa hoose family. Aye, that wid get the nebby neigbours bletherin! Oh, here's another wan.....aye jist a wummin in a vw polo. Ach, that's nae guid; ah want the good lookin laddies.
Right better er herm, clean the windaes, they are gie mocket.
Take care hen and tell me whits happenin oer your side o' toon.
Agnes.

Hi Senga

See yu've been awa yer holidays hen; ah think um needin wan n'aw but maybe wan day. Ah keep lookin in the paper fur wan o' they long weekends but Bob's no happy goan wan o' they planes. Ah keep addin up the cally dosh n' aw but um no that guid at keepin ma figures. Um no guid at keeping ma figure neither but that's by the by. Hoo's the diet goin?
Right, loads tae be gettin oan wae.
See ye in the near future um sure,

Agnes x

Edited by author 11-11-2005 06:09 AM
Senga, um fair worried aboot ye hen. Dinnae tell me ye caught a wee bug while ye wur awa yer holidays! Jist, ah huvnae heard fae ye fur a wee while. Ur ye aw richt? Geez a wee bell or an email so's um no frettin sae much.
Take care hen,
Agnes :-S

P.S. Even Bob wiz askin after ye, noo there's a turn up fur the books. He's normally goat his face burried in the newspaper!

Dear agnes,

Am dain jist fine but huv hud nae time fur onithin recently, whit wae oor Shug movin back hame an tryin tae organise ma new windaes afore the winter really sets in - it's blawin a gail the noo - near rattlin the auld windaes richt oot thur frames, so it is!
A wiz worried aboot the phone bills an aw, so am oan incomin only an hivin tae dae this wee note tae ye fae the library - but a kin still answer ma phone if ye ever cared tae gie me a call.
Am dain a few hoors at NYK, jist typin an the like, as the new edition is due oot in a fortnight.
A will catch up soon, amidst the mad last minute Christmas shoppin rush, nae doot!
Say hello tae Bob,
love Senga

Dearest Senga

Here noo, braw new windaes an'aw? Well, ye've fairly gone up in the world eh hen. Mind,soonds like ye've hud tae gie up the phone-calls tae pay fur them but. Robbin Peter tae pay Paul....things never change they never dae. U'll mind and call ye the night when um finished this.
Ah wiz awa tae the shops wae oor Fiona the day and ye ken me, got masel a braw new pair o' breeks in the closin doon sale. But Senga, had tae buy the next size up! Bloody hell, things are gettin serious that ah need tae get the bigger size in tracky bums!
Here, are you still on thon diet? Mind, ye telt me the other week. Wiz it oany guid? Ah tell ye, um even thinkin o' havin thon staples in ma gutt, whit dae ye think? U'll hae tae(er herm) git back tae the auld joab tae pay fur it mind. Jist dinnae tell Bob!! Ach, he willnae notice oanyway. It's ma health um worried aboot noo hen. Ah dinae want tae be kickin the bucket before um 50!!
Och, tell ye whit , U'll gie ye a wee phone the noo and hae a wee blether,
See ye in a wee minitey!
Agnes.

Edited by author 11-22-2005 11:34 AM
Here Hen

U've just sent a wee poem tae that poetry section on tae the scottish writers bit, www.nowyouknow.co.uk Ye ken; the wans ye dae a bit o' typin fur. Did ye ken Gill was erm herm, writin tae thon Derum? Ah jist came o'er it perchancity and well hen, see when Gill gits in fae her wurk the night a wull kill her!
U've telt her and ah huv telt her until um blue in the face tae keep away fae aw them weird poets but will she be telt? In deed she wulnae! Ah thought ye wid hae telt me hen ah mean, we are pals n that!
Och, u've tae make the tea. Jist you explain yersel or a will be o'er tae sort you oot too!!

AGNES :-| (no impressed by the way!!)

Ma dearest Agnes,

A did tae tell ye aboot thon Gill... mind a telt ye when a phont ye tae tell ye ma phone wiz back oan again? Maybe a furgoat? But am shair a telt ye aw aboot hur an hur philandrin capers oan they messageboards wae yon Derum... a definitely telt the ed! A wis a bit worried aboot it, masel, like, fur a ken whit baith Gill an thon Derum bloke is like. But am shair they baith ken whit thur dain an efteraw, thur aboot twa thoosand miles apairt so whit herm kin come o' it aw? Am thinkin' it's jist a wee bit o' a laugh, masel an a wis thinkin that maybee we could dae w wee bitty poetics oorsels. Fancy it? A'll dae a crappy rhyme jist tae git us stertit if ye like?

VOTE FUR AGNES 'N' SENGA - TWA SCOTTISH BURDS!

http://www.agnesnsenga.co.uk

A thousand appologies Senga,

yer richt as usual. Ye ken me, in wan ear and oot the other. Hoo kid ah no click thon Gill and Derum wur at it; well, sendin poems ah mean. U've bin tryin tae git Gill oan her mobile but she's switched it aff or reception is bloody bad as usual.
Aye, maybe yer right, just a wee giggle but ah wiz bleezin so ah wiz hen when ah seen thon poems.
Talkin aboot poems hen, whit dae yae mean aboot us daen a bit o' poetics? Is that oanythin tae dae wae poems like? Och ye'll o' seen ma effort LOL Pit it this way, it rhymes wae bright and it's no often um right. Aye, ah might need a wee help tae get me goin.
By the way pet, huv you been daen oany votin? Ye ken me, donnert as usual and kept pittin in a vote fur near everyone, jist tae see if the button wiz wurkin like. Ye'll be please tae ken Senga, the Ed's button is wurkin fine.
Well, u'll be lookin forward tae yer wee poem. It wull be like pushin an elephant up the staers but u'll dae ma best,
take care Senga,
Agnes :-) x

Sob, sob, sob.....how kid ye Senga, a thocht we wur pals :-(

Agnes, hen, whit's irkin ye noo? Is it aw that stuff aboot your Boab? A wuidnae worry aboot it, hen, fur oor Erchie's nain too chuffed tae see it scrawlt aw ower they messageboards aboot me ower Derum's knee - a mean, it's aw in the best fun, hen, so dinnae fash yersel.

Cheer up, hen, an a'll be roon fur a wee cup ae tea later,
See ye hen,
Senga.

Damn! A furgoat the website details again!!! Sorry Ed. :)

http://www.nowyouknow.co.uk

VOTE FOR AGNES & SENGA!!!!

AGNES! AGNES! AGNES!

Yer ne'er gonnae believe this.... I'VE JIST WON THE LOTTERY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kin ye believe it? Noo dinnae git too excitit fur it wisnae the big wan, it was the next wan doon, but it disnae maiter, hen, fur £245,419 wull dae me jist fine!!! There! Whit dae ye think o' that wee bit news?
Noo, git yer glad rags oot fur wur goin tae Blackpool fur a wee hurl aroon thon Tower ballroom. Tell Bob tae git red up and sling a suit in a suitcase. Oor Erchie's jist awa doon the laundrette way his tae git it freshed up a bit - eez no hid it oan since thon waddin back in '89!
Talk tae ye soon, hen, am awa tae dae ma nails an tint ma heid.

A DID IT AGAIN!!!!! website - http://www.nowyouknow.co.uk :)

Hawwwwwwwwww Senga

You've won the lottery??!! Hell, wummin why did ye no phone me? U'll need tae get intae toon tae git somethin posh fur oor wee jaunt. When ur ye plannin oan goin? It's no this weekend is it? U'll no be able tae make it hen but next week wid be grand.
U've bought some new bits so that'ull be guid but no wae a sparkly frock! Git back tae me, phone me fur Godsake so as a kin get masel sortit oot! U'll be able tae squeeze intae yon body stockin a bought fur fat folk, it takes pounds aff ye; ah bought it aff the telly. Jist dinnae tell Boab, it cost an arm and a leg!
Here, ull text ye afore ah go gaddin aroon the shops.
Yer a lucky bessom so ye are!!!!!!!
Well dun,
Agnes :-)

SENGA IS CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE

PLEASE LEAVE YOUR MESSAGES HERE AND SHE WILL GET BACK TO YOU AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

THANK YOU.

Senga said 'oops' and to add the following...

VOTE FOR AGNES & SENGA AT http://www.nowyouknow.co.uk

Here Senga

Where huv ye shot aff tae noo? Ah couldnae git a haud o' ye hen, bin and bought a new frock and no where tae wear it! Where the hell are ye?!!

Agnes

Hell, ull no git ma money back oan ma new frock, a bought it in the Debenams sale!!

Ull see YOU when ye decide tae git back tae me. Bloody wummin. Here! ah bet she didnae win the lottery at aw!!

Haw Agnes,

Am richt here where a aye um an a huvnae bin oniwhere. An a dinnae think ye've bin tryin tae git a hod o' me at aw, fur ma phone's richt here in ma bag wae nae new messages oan it an a huvnae hid nae emails or hoose calls. Ur ye shair ye hiv the richt number, hen?
Am dain ma shoppin fur this flamin 'Christmas' saga... gits me fair scunnert, so it does. Am rushin aboot lik a heedless chicken an ye ken whit? Efter aw this is ower, an the wee bitty money's aw gone, am back tae bein skint an thur dratted Christmas still comes back roon again next year! It's wurse than any bloody burthday a've ever kent! At least they huvnae stoapt us ha'in a turkey yit! So they cannae aw hae caught yon bird flu that they ken-it-aws wiz yakkin aboot!

Meant tae say... dinnae be sae sorry aboot the frock, Hen. A still kep a wee bit back fur the holidays an a whoppin great party EFTER aw this festive mallarky is ower an din wae.

An afore a furget...
VOTE AGNES & SENGA
http://www.nowyouknow.co.uk

Aye well, ah think ah get ye noo. Oki, I'll git the frocks intae the auld moth balls until we get pertyin!

Git back tae me hen,
Agnes.

http://www.nowyouknow.co.uk

Dear Agnes,

How's the Chrissie shoppin goin? Am thinkin a hiv din aw mine oan the Internet this year, an a huvnae half hid a few wee bargains. A tell ye, it's amazin whit ye kin git fur a couple a quid noo-adays!
A jist goat oor Erchie a brand new portable CD player - ye ken the kind a mean? Wan he kin sit oan the bench or hae in eez poaket oan the bus wae the earphones in listenin tae the music? Aye! Wan o' them! A goat it fur A POUND!!! Brand new it wiz, an still in the box! A wisnae grumblin at the couple o' pounds postage when it wiz that price!
Hiv ye bin ower tae see the wee oanline shoap the ed wiz talkin aboot? Take a deck whenever ye git the chance - it's ower at http://www.cyberdosh.com Ye should reach it jist by clickin oan that link a jist gied ye.
Am awa fur another wee swatch at the auctions noo - dinae be goin an outbiddin me noo!

VOTE AGNES & SENGA at http://www.nowyouknow.co.uk

Haw Senga
Thon website looks a guid wan. When am no so busy ah will hae a better swatch at it aw. Um awa tae see ma boss the day, ye ken the wan that gied me a wee job at cleanin the offices. They're awfae nice but the mess they leave me fur the end o' the day, a tell ye, it's pure mingin!!
Ah didnae think ah wid end up cleanin but needs must. It's payin fur the Christmas presents. Um no sure if u'll keep it goan efter the holidays but if it fits in wae lookin efter the grand weans and Boab disnae mind - u'll see.
Um awa tae finish the presents the day, ah hate shoppin so ah dae!
Hope tae see ye afore the holidays or u'll be on the blower oanyway,
Take care hen,
Love far Agnes xx

Agnes,

Ye ken yon CD player a telt ye aboot, the wan a goat fir a pound? The ed goat wan fur 50p!!! A kid ye no! 50p! Am considerin gittin masel wan o' they Cyberdosh names so a kin git sellin ma auld clais an' that. If it wisnae fur the postin o' it a wid hae baked some shortbread and selt it fur Hogmanay, but am thinkin it micht git gie crumbled!

Maybe oor Erchie'll bring me a wee hurl up tae see ye ower the Christmas holidays.
Talk tae ye soon, Hen, an hopefully see ye an aw!

SITE REVIEW FOR HARMONS COUNTRY STORE

Agnes,
Wuid ye hae a wee quick look at this website fur me and see whit ye think. A ken it's in the States, like, but they want us tae dae a wee review fur thum. A hiv already been an hid a quick shifty aboot the place an tae be honest, a wisnae too impressed by the welcome a goat oan arrival fur a couldnae wurk oot whit, exactly, they wur sellin at furst.
However, they wee burd boxes are fair braw!! A wuid fair fancy wan o' them fur oot the back!
Let me ken whit ye think an then wu'll git back tae the site owner bloke an tell him exactly whit we thoght o' his website fae an ootsider's point o' view.
Talk tae ye soon, hen, am awa tae scrape the rice aff the erse o' ma soup pot an see if a kin salvage oni mair chicken aff they bones. They've bin bilin aw day!

Check out http://www.Harmonscountrystore.biz

Return to http://www.nowyouknow.co.uk

Vote for Agnes & Senga!

Haw Agnes, hae ye seen this?

"THE public are to be told not to smoke in their own homes as part of plans to protect public sector workers from the effect of passive smoking."

A jist read it oot the Scotsman, so it must be true, eh? A think it's a load ae tosh! Kin ye imagine ma grannie stubbin oot hur fags an hour afore the cooncil gits there? Thur never oan time! Am gittin gie fed up wae aw this fag talk... nae smokin here, nae smokin there, nae smokin everywhere, an whit a cannae wurk oot is... if aw this bloody smokin is sae bad fur us aw - smokers an non-smokers alike - why the hell ur they no jist bannin aw tobacco products? Am thinkin the whole bloody lot o' it is a pure con! A mean... ye ken us, jist as a couple o' examples. A huvnae hud a fag since ma maw's birthday in October but am damned shair an am hivvin wan efter ma turkey dinner. An a ken fine weel ma grannie only smokes when the cooncil bloke's visitin, fur she never buys fags an he ay hus tae gie her wan. An a ken fine weel that ma maw an ma grannie wull baith be smokin efter thur turkey dinner, fur am buyin the fags. In fact, a wis gonnae try tae git they fancy smancy Sobranis, ye ken the wans a mean? Aw fancy colours an gold tips an that? Fair posh they ur, especially fur Christmas.

Am away noo, a jist needit a moan.
Senga :)

Och a furgoat again!

Vote fur us here >>> http://www.agnesnsenga.co.uk or here >>> http://www.nowyouknow.co.uk

Agnes Kens a Guid Wan When She Sees It!!
 
Ah wiz in Stirling the other day, haen a boogle in aw the shops, as ye dae like when its sale time. Well, ye ken me, it's no lang afore ma bellies thinkin ma throats been cut so ah thoucht tae masel. "Here, gang awa intae thon 'Les Cygnes' an see if it's still as guid as it wiz last summer!"
Well ah kid you not people, ma jaw near hit the flair! Its aw been dun up like. No wae the decor since it is fair braw oanyway but mair tables an chairs; whit a difference it's made.
So ah hud wan o' their crackin cups o' coffee and scones, (an dinnae furget the complimentary chocolate wae it). Once ah goat ma chops roond that, ah was in heaven, so a wiz!
So bein a blether like ah am, asked fur Margaret, thon afie nice wummin who ah chatted tae last time. Well, she wiznae in but ah fund oot ah wiz talkin tae the manager, John Maxwell. Well, ah got on the crack wae him big time. He redd his crapple an wait fur it.......he telt me the cafe wiz intae a competition, the 'Forth Valley Good Food Award' an they wur in the top 5! Ah tell ye, ah wiz well taen up wae it! Ah fun oot that the other cafe' The Rock Cafe' the wan ah thoucht wiz the bees knees tae, wiz in the competition tae! ( ah couldnae tell ye where they are in the competition mind, sorry!).
So, there ye are. Ye'll fund oot who wins on the 24th o' January. See ah telt ye, Agnes kens a guid coffee an scone when she see wan!
Ah did get a row though, fur no tellin thum when 'Oor Wallace' wiz oan! How embarrassin!! Wae aw the things Gill hud tae dae fur 'Oor wallace' she forgot to pop in, ah did apologise fur her mind. John did say Gill kin gie thum flyers fur thon new play, 'Golfing Genius', it's oan at the end o' March.
So people, awa tae Stirling tae the best cafe oot! "Les Cygnes"

Return to http://www.agnesnsenga.co.uk

'Forth Valley Good Food Award'

Here ah mar tryin tae stoap bubblin. Ah had a bit blether wae Margaret yesterday, an ah wiz telt Les Cygnes came second in the awards! Ah tell ye, ah wiz so prood o' thum. They were pleased n'awa like.
Ah hud tae run fur ma bus though, so couldnae ston gasin awa aw day.
Jist tae say well done yoos lot!

Jist haepened upon this site by mustake.Ah hae bin oot oh touch wae the Scottish patois fur a lang time but the story oh yous yins geed me sic a good laf ah neerly pust me breeks!
Oh the best ya twoh wee slappers!

'Twas awfy nice tae hear fae ye, a hiv tae tell ye, but wur no really a pair o' slappers, so dinnae bother peein nae breeks ower the likes o' us.
I's bin some time sic onibody's even bin spaikin tae us, so there ye go - yer the furst we've hud in a while! Gone yersel!

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Edited by author 06-15-2007 08:27 PM
Haw Senga hen,
hope yer dain oki pet. Ah ken, ah ken, its bin a long time bit uv been fair busy so ah huv. Wit wae wurkin the wains fae the Raploch an'ah tell ye, wit a crackin bunch oh bairns they ur, an wae helpin oot wae the learners fae Stirlin ma heid's been in a burl so it hus.
Uv even moved hame n'aw! No as grand as it wiz afore bit beggars canny be choosers. Ye'll hae tae take a hurl up the M8 when yer biddin wae yer maw fur a while un even stay a wee whilie. Uv goat a braw new hair do tae, disnae make me look oany slimmer mind. Och a jist cannae keep aff the chocolate these days.

Here, wits this Excile oan here? Pissin their breeks oar summit? Ah cannae unnerstoan wit fur. Can twa lassies no hae a wee blether wae oot upsettin folks oany mair. Ah think they shid make an appointment fur the doc like, ah wid be fair worried masel!! Here, maybe we shid advise them tae use thae 'Tenna Lady' yer aye usin, can ye no mind? When ye were aye daen that very same thing? Aye, they worked wunners an tae be honest, ah hae a wee box unner the sink in the bathroom jist in case.
Och well, better hit ma pit, been a lang day so it has. Keep in touch hen, if a dinnae see ye thro the week ull see ye thro the windnae.
BTW, hows the wee problem daen? Ye ken....thon rash ye hud. Ah dinnae like tae mention it like bit, uv bin fair wurried. Let me ken about aw yer gen.
Take care pet,
Agnes x

Agnes, doll! Yer alive an weel!! A thocht ye hid gang aff wae a sailor!
An' ye've flittit tae a new hoose? Michty me, a cannae believe it, hen, fur wur dain the exact same oorsels aroon aboot the Glesga Fair! Wur no goin faur, jist a wee bitty up the street fae where we ur the noo, an oor Anna's gittin tae keep this hoose oan fur hur an the wean an that.

A saw yon telly programme aboot the Raploch weans, it wis fair guid, a tell ye. Am gled yer helpin oot a bit an a kin see thur a grand lot despite thur ha'in they junkies aboot thum.

The toon's bin gie busy recently, whit wae folks moovin and runnin aff wae each ither's men! A tell ye, the soaps hae nought oan us an am thinkin am livin in a telly script the noo!! Bit a'll tell ye aw aboot it when we catch up noo a ken yer in contact again.

Kin ye mind a telt ye aboot ma new joab? The wan a dae fae hame? Am sellin stuff ower the Internet, hen, so a mur! An a think yur needin tae git yersel ower ther tae see whit it's aw aboot. I goat stertit through yon cyberdosh thingey, it's www.cyberdosh.co.uk the address ye kin fun it oan. It's FREE, an ye kin gab oan there and sell yur crap an buy a load mair crap wae whit yer makin aff yer ain crap. A kid ye no, it's lik goin tae a carboot sale waeoot hain tae hae a motor!

Oniways, am gonnae go noo an see whit a kin fun tae buy fur oor Erchie's needin a pullover an a pair o' braces - am shair thu'll hae thum oan there cheap.

By the way, tho wee rash problum a hid his fair clear't up weel... a wis allergic tae ma new nylon nightie!!! Ye ken thon see-through number a telt ye aboot, aw black an flouncy an it neer gied oor Erchie a stroke! Well, a flung it oot, or did a flog it oan eBid, a cannae richt mind, an it's the auld flanelette goonies fur me noo! A guess thur's nae disguisin the fact wur jist gittin auld!

Talk tae you soon,
Senga

Haw Agnes, ur ye oot ther?

A hiv jist goat ma newsletter an hae ye seen the post aboot the Cyberdosh thing? Check it oot, hen, fur wur supposed tae be in it fur thur 2008 Challenge.

http://www.cyberdosh.com

Edited by author 11-07-2007 08:56 PM
Haaaaaaw Senga!

Wull wid ye credit it! Yer moving hoose an so a mar! Aye, flitted tae Bonnybridge! Ah ken, ah ken bit it wiz tha or bein kicked oot oan oor erses or find a new place tae bide. Bob wiz made reduntant yit again an we couldnae git another hoose fae the cooncil well; no a guid wan oanyway. So, we're in some butt n ben right in the middle oh Bonnybridge, ah can tell yae there's some choice characters here hen. Will ye no hae a wee hurl tae see ma crackin hoose? Crackin bein the appropriate wurd hen fur it's a pit, never been in such a mankie hoose Noo that's bad fur me tae say it cause ye ken am no really that hoose prood.
I'll take ye doon the local fur a wee swallie an efter a few, tho local laddies arnie as pig ugly as ye furst think.
A ken ye were always goan on aboot thon UFO's in Bonnybridge but am beginnin tae think aw them stories ur a load oh shite (can a say thon wurd??) It's only they men oan the swallie or the weans poppin happy pills that seem tae see thum. Dinnae fret hen, um keepin a watchful eye when a go tae pit the rubbish oot every nite!
Aye well, gies a yell doon thon mobile that's ayewiz stuck in yer erse pocket, ull no be surprised if it draps doon the lavie wan day!
Take care Senga, we'll huv tae git the gither!!!

Agnes xxx

BRAVEHEARTS CHILDRENS' TRUST APPEAL

Dear Readers, I NEED YOUR HELP!

The user known as 'hypnotoad' on the eBid online auctions has thrown down his gauntlet and challenged me. I have accepted his challenge and the deadline is dawn on 23rd November 2007.

Should I succeed in this challenge, an extra £30 will be donated to Bravehearts Childrens Trust, who grant wishes for sick and dying children.

All that I need of you for my challenge to succeed is to follow this link and VOTE. If you cannot click the link, copy it and paste it into your browser and then go vote, please.

 http://helpdesk.ebid.net/showthread.php?t=98218

It will cost you nothing, I only need to raise a minimum of 80 votes in order to succeed and raise this cash, which I will personally make up to £50. I already have 34 votes - I need at least another 47. Voting is completely anonymous and it is a simple one click polling system. I ask you as friends, as neighbours, as associates, as fellow eBid members and as supporters of all that Cyberdosh stands for - the freedom to earn, and spend, as we like.

Thank you.

If you are not a member of eBid, you can join at http://www.cyberdosh.co.uk and then go to the forums, look for the KT (Kitchen Table) and then click on the link that says Poll, Polls, Polls...

Thank you, in advance, to anyone who chooses to support this cause.

Haw Senga!!!!!

Git yer erse back oan this site hen, feel like um bletherin oan tae ma sel'the day. Ah ken ah dae that oanyways bit u've got sum news. U'll git oan the blower the night an tell ye aw aboot it but had tae try oot ma new toy. No that sort o' toy hen fur goad sake, a computer!! Wan a kin play aboot wae an kin watch Jeremy kyle at the same time. (Um still talkin aboot ma computer Senga!!) It's no very comfy oan ma lap mind you even although it says that oan the boax!
So, it's comin up fur Christmas an ma wee joab has ended doon the Raploch. Ah wurked it oot that wae bus rides in an oot tae Stirlin it wiz costin me more than whit ah wiz earnin. Only took me 3 months tae wurk that wan oot!! Aye, cleanin wisnae ma cup o' tea oanyways, its no ma 'fortae' as ye ken Senga lol. Ah dinnae ken whit ull git up tae but it wull be grand tae dae sumthin nearer hame.
Oh by the way, dae ye mind thon website aw aboot us? Ah dinnae think its got ma right email address oan it cause u've oanly hud wan email fae a laddie in Italy! Ah thocht it wiz fae a lassie like, sayin they fancied me rotten by the way! Andrea's a lassies name is it no? But when they wur goan oan an oan aboot ma erse, ma jaw near hit the lobby flair!! Well, ah chatted tae mae neiboor Betty aboot it an she near wet hur knickers, hee haw an laughin! Ah near decked hur wan so ah did. But noo ah ken it wiz a laddie well, that cheered me up no end. Where's the Scottish laddies tho? Bloody Italy, it's no as if ye kin gang oot fae a coffee an scone wae oot bein noticed like. The auld man wid be waitin fur his tea fur a gie long time an that's no lie!
Right hen, better git busy, as usual ma ironin pile isnae gettin oany smaller. Let's see if we can git the gither afore Christmas eh?
Love tae aw,
Agnes x