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Topic: Post a Short Story for Review
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NinjaBoy  124
09-25-2009 03:35 AM ET (US)
Edited by author 09-25-2009 03:37 AM
(ELEMENT KING) lee.spencer@yahoo.com Fantasy/Fiction in the works

Rayiko Shima use to be a regular 9th grade student attending Sacratomei junior high, one day Rayiko comes across a peculiar bracelet, planning on giving the bracelet to his mother as a gift, a bunch of mysterious men in black chases after him, but suddenly a young man saves Rayiko, and leaves before Ray could say thank you. To his surprise the bracelet magically has appeared on his wrist, and he can’t take it off. The gift he wanted to give his mother is stuck to his wrist, during that same day he encounters a weird woman that warns him about that bracelet, Rayiko decides to run away from the weird lady and go home. That night he trys to struggle to take off the bracelet, something weird instantly happened he becomes the flame God Burgus burning his sheets. After that he changes back, and decides he should go to bed since he got in so late. But what Rayiko doesn’t know, he has more in store in the future with the bracelet and those men in black.

Rayiko Shima. Age14. SG: Tamaruku the sage frog

 Rayiko is a pretty honest 9th grader living with his widowed mother, Rayiko comes from a poor household but him and his mother are proud people, and appreciate everything they have. One day Rayiko’s gift to his mother gets stuck to his wrist, a odd bracelet that gives Rayiko the ability to become the four elemental gods, this changes everything for Ray, for he is introduce to a new world. Full of weird creatures called soul guides and dark guides, and a shadowy group after that Bracelet that Ray holds.



Soul Guides and Dark Guides: Soul guides are clean souls in shape of certain creatures, Dark guides are like soul guides but evil attacking innocent humans, most of these dark souls are the cause of these so called terrorist attacks. Soul and dark guides are all bounded to their owner which are humans, they simply guide them and protect them, only few around the world are able to see their guide, those who cannot, well you ever heard the term “my conscious must be talking.” The shadowy Group have all harnessed their Dark guide each of them have powerful guides.



FOUR ELEMENTAL GODZ Stats are 1-100

               



These are four of Rayikos elemental forms; they each have their own strength and weaknesses. Also their own soul guides. Burus The Flame, Cura Of Aqua, Ion Of Earth, Evalis The Wind, and a unknown form, but powerful








Gamma ???. Age???(Looks21) SG, Omni The Rabbit General

 Gamma is the weird woman according to Ray who he meets during that bad day of his, who seems to know a lot about Rayikos situation. She works for a secrete group or agency that battle the shadowy group protecting people from dark guides. Right now Gamma has disguised herself as a teacher at Sacratomei middle, she seems to go by the alias Mrs.Santaku. all the horny middle schoolers drool over her. But her true mission is watch over Rayiko and keep the shadow group hands off that bracelet.
===================================

Advent ??? Age,19 SG, Neo The Two wing Nymph

 The young Advent. He’s also part of the same agency as Gamma. Advent at first seems like just your average young careless punk, but he’s actually a strong young careless punk. Advent hates his job, and acts lazy at times, but when it comes to action and fighting the shadow agency it’s a whole different story. Advent has a powerful soul guide. His soul guide and his hair are multi colored like the ying and yang sign. For they had a pretty bad past, advent has once embraced the dark side a long time ago.
===============================================

Keri Sanada. Age, 17

 Keri Sanada is very beautiful and is Rayikos crush, but he is afraid to speak to her since shes a 3rd year in highschool, also she comes from a rich family.
=====================================
Ren Masada, Age14. SG, Tetsumi The Night Wolf, and Li,ith The Dragon

 The new kid at Sacrotomei. Ren is immediately picked on and is called the freak kid. Ren has twoDark soul guides, and every time he comes close to killing a bully with his Guide, he is interrupted, but when he meets Ray he is kind of happy that he isn’t the only one that can see guides. After befriending Ray, Ray influences him to use his guide for good, protecting others from evil . Ren has hidden power and is grandson to one of the Shadow Agents in the counsel who also has two guides to which would explain his power and his two guides as well.
===================================
DT. Yarobi, Age, 42. SG Tetsmonoro the squirrel

 The ace detective Yarobi. Yarobi is interested in Rayikos power, and investigates the boy and his power.

===================================

Roken Ogawa, Age,15 SG, Dark Elf Nimrook


 Roken is captain of the Sacratomei middle school fighting team, also one of the best in all the sports at sacratomei, Roken is a jerk and lead head, but in some sort he’s kind of Rays friend, Roken doesn’t see Guides but he’ll gain the ability to see his. But Roken is actually a little like Ray, Roken comes from a poor house hold as well where he takes care of his mother and little brother, Roken is working hard in school actually he isn’t dim witted on purpose, he’s tryna become stronger to protect his family.
=================================== Tei Hajiko, Age, 14 SG, The light goat
 Tei Hajiko is the most popular student in Sacratomei Middle, he can get any girl he wants. But something weird happens to Tei, he sees these weird goat creatures, eventually after finding out that Ray sees the same thing, Tei is given answers he probably wont be able to handle. Soon enough Tei becomes a friend to Ray, helping him battle evil guides and learning of the shadow group.
==================================

Fuya Oasaya, Age14,
            Fuya pesters Rayiko at times, and is very loud, nosy and obnoxious and she’s actually Rays friend, she was his first friend actually ever since they were young and he was new, She’s probably his closet friend. Fuya can get in a lot of trouble since she takes no crap from no one, also means getting Ray beat up.




 THE SHADOW AGENCY

Admis ??? Age? SG, Mantor The Great Gargoyle

 Once a regular high school student, Admis soon enough became lost in the darkness, along with his once pure soul guide. Admis moved up fast in rank, becoming a shadow general under Seiden, he hopes to make it on the shadow counsel one day
=======================================
                                                  Merlith ??? Age? SG, Impa Of The Neither World She’s under Seiden, and is very loyal to him also Admis, only because she’s fond of Admis, but she knows their love can never be embrace since they’re under this dark faction. Merlith guide seems puny and small, but its transformation is formidable, for it becomes the true Impa Of The Neither World.

======================================
Sake ??? Age? SG Fuma

 : A silent dark type, Sake is queit and quick, he’s part of Seidens group along with Hitada. Hitada is very power, stronger than the other 2, Merlith and Hitada, his true form is devastating, almost close to Admis power.

=======================================

Hitada ??? Age? SG, Devil Henna

  A formidable warrior, who loves a good fight. Hitada only joined the shadows because he was looking for a thrill and someone powerful, Hitada is very powerful hisself, and is legend for killing many soul guides and their owner.
=======================================
Shadow Lord Seiden, Age? SG, Megis The Sun Demon

 One of lords of the shadows. Seiden is very young, but his powers exceeds many, just Rayikos bracelet Seiden carries a ancient artifact of his own, but it’s a necklace. The shadow counsel assigned him and his squad to retrieve that bracelet Ray holds.
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