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Topic: Dreaming Hands to Hold You Underwater (You'll Learn to Breathe Water)
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Prankster  478
03-01-2005 04:58 AM ET (US)
Hey Bill, I know you're not sold on the upcoming Hitchhiker's Guide movie, but there's a really excellent new internet-only trailer that just came out in quicktime:

http://boss.streamos.com/download/ugo/ugo/...kersguide_02_hi.mov
Bill the SplutPerson was signed in when posted  477
02-27-2005 04:20 PM ET (US)
Don't go here! Go to the New Comments Page.
Bill the SplutPerson was signed in when posted  476
02-26-2005 11:37 PM ET (US)
Edited by author 02-26-2005 11:39 PM
SteveM:
Umm, no, still there. You'll have to watch an ad, then click through for a "free day pass."
Unless, of course, Salon has different rules for foreigners. If so, well--here goes, the direct links:

http://www.blur.com/shorts/gopher_broke/index.html

http://www.plymptoons.com/
Look for "Guard Dog"

http://www.nfb.ca/oscars2005/nfbpop2.html
Ryan

http://www.735am.com/

Find your own link to the really sucky short. edit: Which is none of the above.
Bill the SplutPerson was signed in when posted  475
02-26-2005 11:24 PM ET (US)
Yeah, I think possums are cute, too. Except for the tails.

I think that any "ugly animal" contest that doesn't include Cheney is rigged from the start! "With its fleshy, hairless, dick-shaped head and repulsive natural sneer, this bloated mammal rips into any prey it can find, rendering it into small, digestable chunks for <i>Halliburtonus corruptus</a>, AKA the common corporate weasel."

Speaking of animals, let's move onto the more lovable variety:

Asshole kidnaps neighbor's cat and--as his lawyer sez:
    "Cortes' attorney, James Benjamin, said the cat was a stray and that his client saved the animal's life by not leaving it at an animal shelter, where it could have been killed.

    'He took it to a safe-looking place where there are a lot of mice'."

The place? He dumped the cat in the FUCKING EVERGLADES.
Mice, alligators, whatevah. HUMANITARIAN of the YEAR award!

Most annoying thing: after the incident's happy ending (hooray!), he didn't get charged with "kidnapping with intent to kill," as he would if the victim was a human, but "petty theft."
People who abuse, torture or kill pets go on to abuse, torture or kill human beings. Have you ever heard of a serial killer who loved his pets? When will the law ever recognize this? Why are there harsh mandatory sentences for victimless crimes like "statuatory rape" and "pot smoking," but slaps on the wrists for the torture or murder of pets? And which perp goes on to be a bigger threat to the community?
SteveMPerson was signed in when posted  474
02-26-2005 05:03 PM ET (US)
Bugger, they pulled all the short movies.
And just when I had an hour of my life to waste!
Fistlekits  473
02-26-2005 12:02 PM ET (US)
Re ugly animal voting: I personally think that the possums, bats, and mole rats are cute.

And how could anyone think that the manatee is ugly? Lookit that whiskery snout! (Well, they can be pretty ugly... with boat propeller scars.)
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