Hi all,
I feel sorry that it took me so long to read the recent messages--mine were not answered for so long that I forgot to keep checking back. Such is the life of busy mothers!
I am going to follow Meguey's suggestion to go the forum on the motherwoman homepage--hopefully responses and connections will happen more quickly there!
Amy, I want you to know my heart is with you. I, too, am an older mom. I had my youngest at 40--she's 10 now. Divorce is so tough, even if you were the one seeking it (I was). It's harder than death in many ways and I say that as one who ha experienced both. In fact, my work is with grieving families and I often see such beauty there. Divorce is fraught with despair. But please trust that life does improve in many ways. I would love to talk with you more. You can email me at abrushwithfire@yahoo.com if you want to continue the conversation. I still, after having been seperated 7 years and divorced for 3, struggle with many of these issues. But my life is much much happier than it was even 2 years ago. Have faith. And get as much support as you can...it really matters. Michelle, I say all of the above to you, too! We all need to feel supported in this. It is truly scary to be a single mother. But with a lot of buoying one another up, we don't have o feel so alone.
lots of warm loving tender smiles to all the moms out there and especially to the ones feeling all alone,
Kali Bird

Michelle and Kali,
Michelle, thank you so much for responding to my post. I wrote mine in February and you are the first to respond. And, yes, single parenting is even harder than I ever thought it would be and just your acknowlegement is wonderful.
And to Kali, hurray for you for trying to figure out the balance of earning $ and being as available to your children as possible. I empathize with your struggle. Good for you for saying true to your heart.
My best to everyone,
Amy

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Dear kali , amy and all of you other single Mom's out there
You are amazing and brave! The hardest job on earth is being done right now by you alone and you are doing it. I have 3 kids 5-8 and I have been alone for 4 1/2 years, by my choice. I came out of a dark relationship that on set a horrible postpartum depression that I am finally free of. Motherwomen was like the sun shining warm on my face after after a long winter. I wasn't alone, but my journey is mine alone. From the many circle's that I have sat in there are many words of wisdom out there to learn from. My house may never be 'clean' again, I may not ever have ' a lot ' of money. But my children and I love to find our freedom everyday in so many ways, I do get to enjoy they're smiles and hugs and know they are proud of me for doing the best that I can for them.

Hi to the women in this community,
It has been a while since my participation in a group through Mother Woman, that was very wonderful and helpful for me in getting clear that I needed to separate from my marriage. I'm an "older" mom of 5 year old twins and now, having separated now for more than 1 and a half years, with a divorce to be finalized by August probably, I find myself disappointed (to say the least!)to realize I am not particularly "happy". I work full time at a demanding job, live in a small, temporary, very uncharming apt, and have my kids with me 4 nights a week. It is good I left a marriage that was not healthy but I am finding it hard to handle many things about my life right now. Working full time is stressful, along with being on my own with my kids without help or adult stimulation when I do have them,also dealing with the sadness that I am not with them full time and that they have to live in two homes and their heartbreaking sadness that I moved out of the home. It is hard to get to a group again with my schedule so I do find myself a bit isolated. I somehow thought that breaking free from my marriage would enable me to get some more breathing room and start a new life but I find I am so immersed in responsibilities and busyness that I an hardly come up for air. Any ideas, support is welcome.
I see myself as having a positive spirit and would love to feel it soar again. Thanks for reading.... :) Amy

Hello and welcome to you all. I'm so glad you found us. The more of us who are talking together about the real picture of mothering, the better. My children are 11, 7, and 2. When I started with MotherWoman, my oldest was not yet two. I was so isolated and had lost so much sight of who *I* was that I literally looked in the mirror and did not recognize myself. It's in listening to the stories of other women, other mothers, that I realized I was not alone, I was not a bad mother for wanting myself back, and I had the ability to make changes. Thank you for your voices.

You can join the MotherWoman confidential forum by following the link on our homepage. See you there.

Hello to all you mothers out there.
I am a mother of two girls and am currently working on a thesis as part of my masters in social work training at Smith College. The study is on postpartum doula supports and whether they enhance maternal self-confidence and maternal empathy in first time mothers.
I am hoping to interview mothers who are 18 or older who had a postpartum doula with their first child.
If you are such a mother and would have an hour to spare, I would love to talk to you. I live in Northampton and could come to meet you if you don't live too far from here. If your children need to be there too that is fine.
You can email me directly at appleseedbinda@verizon.net if you would like to know more or are interested.
Thanks so much for your time.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Binda

I live far, far away from all of you...all the way up in Alberta in Canada (north of Montana for those who never liked geography) and you are singing my song. I found your group on the hearth foundation website links, and I'm crying as I write this after having read 'the myth of the good mother' journal articles. Thank you thank you thank you. My first child is 11 months and it has been the most incredibly difficult, soul-stretching, exhausting and occasional sublime year of my life....and I feel like so much of the current cultural discourse only skims the surface and glosses over the rough patches. Keep up the good work, I wish I could come visit you!
Namaste

Hi all,
I cried tonight after reading through all the MotherWoman material. I live on the coast of Maine and have a friend in Franklin County who sent me your web address. I moved here from southern Vermont over 8 years ago and immediately my marriage of 16 years fell apart. I've spent the last 8 years learning how to be a single mom, largely unsupported by a community that is too spread out and reticent to recognize the needs of single mothers. I've been getting really angry lately, finally no longer depressed but so unwilling to leave my kids while I go out and work 30 miles away so that I can financially support us. I really have gotten it recently that I, too, unwittingly bought into the cultural norm that any one not out there working full time is negligent and bad. So the guilt I suffer because I can't and won't do that is big but I also have to keep figuring it out, being creative and keeping some $ coming in. I am angry enough about this issue to begin getting politically active about it. I'd love to hear from other single moms and how they're figuring this piece out. We may end up in western Mass eventually-who knows! But in the meantime, I want to see about starting a branch of this beautiful work you're doing up here....is that possible?? And who can I talk to about that? Also, how do I get my hands on the MotheringManifesto to show it here? Thanks so much and joy to you all...

Hi!
I'm wondering what events might be happening in the near future for pregnant women looking for general info and resources/socializing with other moms-to-be. I didn't see anything past August on the events page. Thanks in advance for any suggestions!
-Emma

Hi,

I have been trying to send an e-mail to Abbie about an event on Sept. 29, and granted she already sent out a correction e-mail, stating the address was wrong, I can't get the new one to work either.

Thank you.

Best, Apryl

Hello!
I just wanted to make sure that you folks know about an upcoming local music event called Penelope's Odyssey. The flier follows.

Hope to see you there and thank you,
Lindiwe Jenness


Penelope’s Odyssey: Weaving the Way of the Warrior’s Heart

Local singer/songwriter Regina Doreen performs her sultry and powerful original songs interspersed with stories from Homer’s Odyssey as told by Karen Rock

There will also be poetry and prose readings paying homage to the feminine emotions.

Date: Saturday June 9, 2007
Time: 2-4 pm
Place: The Amherst Room at the Jones Library in Amherst

Free and open to the public.

For more information contact Lindiwe Jenness/Women’s Words at 413-230-3115 or email lindiwejenness@hotmail.com.

Hi everyone. I am wondering if there is any interest in forming a support group for separated/divorcing/divorced single moms. I would love to hear
from anyone who would be interested!!!! You can call me at 775-3839.
Thanks! Amy

Ack! No, this is not a secure message board! If you want to send an e-mail just to me, send it to meguey@earthlink.net, or to annette@motherwoman.org if you want to reach Annette. I'm working on getting a confidential forum up on-line - should be up by the end of March! The forum will be confidential and will require registering a username, so people just passing through will not be able to read all the comments. I'm really sorry for the misunderstanding - it's totally NOT what we're about.

Denise - I'm sorry I didn't get back to you sooner. First off, everything you've said is totally in keeping with the real experience of mothers as understood by MotherWoman. I just have a HUGE blow-up with my 10 yr old son that had me shaking with rage. Thankfully, it ended in hugs, and we're ok now. Several issues of the journal are on-line, just follow the "Journal" buton on the website. Right now, I'm working on getting the last few issues in a digital format to put them up as well. We print about 2000 copies of each Journal and distribute them free around the valley, as well as send out a mailing to everyone who has asked to recieve a copy.

Molly - Welcome to the valley! I hope by now you have found the survival centers in Amherst and Northampton - they can be a *tremendous* resource for people in transition, with free 'stores' for clothes, etc; food pantries; and connections to local services. I highly reccomend them, especially the Amherst one, where I've gone for years, first as a strugglinig parent, then as a volunteer. There are home-schooling groups in the area, and creative work opportunities - I hope you've found them already!

Hi. I just discovered your organization, and what a discover, I'm thrilled!! Now, my eminent reason for writing is to give you a little bit of my story and ask for some advise to any and all who may read this. I moved to South Hadley just under a month ago after fleeing what had just become a domestic violent situation. I'm glad that I did not think about this too much before taking action, because some insight into the realities of single parenting may have influenced, or at least stalled my decision to get the kids out of there.
So here we are, the three of us, staying with friends and much, much happier for making the move. But now I am forced to look at the reality of our situation and see that I am completely broke and that eventual child support payments are not going to cut it. Now, I enjoy living simply, and I am embracing the fact that we have shed most of our possessions, which became burdens on our previous life in the Berkshires, but on the other extreme now, I can scarcely afford to clothe the children and myself. I have sought public aid resources and believe that somehow this will all turn around for us. After all of this background, what I really wanted to ask is if anyone knows of some part time work in the Valley area which would allow me to bring my youngest (10 mo. old)child to work with me. She's a happy-go-lucky child who is content to be slung to me, but I just can't find such a situation. I also am trying to connect with home school groups or like-minded families with children in the same age range for play groups. If anyone has some leads for me, I offer my gratitude in advance. There's much more to share than this unusual introduction. Let's talk some more. Peace & Light, Molly M.

Hey Meguey -
I thought I was replying directly to you...so imagine my surprise to find my e-mail posted on the site! So much for the anonimity I was hopin for! LOL!!
I was writing in response to your request for me to write a half page for the journal about my depression / anxiety & panic disorder / and how it was affecting my parenting.... That's what my message yesterday was all about!
Again - I'd still like to know more about Mother Woman, and what the "journal" is all about and how to send in a written piece for it...
Thanks!
--Denise

Hey Meguey -
   
  I got this from you in December...not a good time. Lots has transpired since then. Some good, some of the same old same old. I don't understand how often your "journal" is printed, or what exactly goes into being part of the "Mother Woman" group. Funny thing is the counselor who pointed me in your direction is a man, and he didn't really have much to tell me except "you might want to check this out" when he handed me a flyer.
  I wanted to let you know that I didn't respond for two reasons. #1: I'm not sure if I can put what I feel into the printed word and not sound like the woman who lived at the end of the block where I grew up. She was looney, her kids ran wherever they wanted, and no one was accountable. But woe to you if you were in the room when she went off about something. More than once I was part of the group that ran for their lives as she threw her slippers in our direction. I never really understood the running part - in my home if my mother said "freeze" or "come back here", you did exactly as you were told!
  #2: I really wanted to check out your organization a bit first. I'm not a real "earthy" kind of mom. Alot of what I believed to be true and good about pregnancy, birthing, and being the best mom I could be went by the wayside. First when I found myself experiencing uncomfortable sieges while pregnant. I had back pain like I have never felt in my life, I lost half of what I ate daily and still managed to gain an unbelievable 50lbs both times. Then after both of my 8 lb+ girls were born by c-section I experienced post partum depression that nearly drove me to the brink of psychosis. The after the birth of my second child it took me 16 months to raise from the fog. I remain on 3 different meds to this day (she's 4 now) just to "maintain". I have had friends over the past 8 years that make it look so easy, so right...handling the babes so gently, being a kind & soft spoken mother, and loving every moment of it. To be truthful, I on the other hand have days when I want to get into my SUV and just drive away. I'm not kind, I'm not gentle, and I do not see myself as a good mom or wife. But my kids hug me and kiss me, and my husband loves me just the same.
  So...if I could understand a bit more about your organization first, then perhaps I could work my way up to writing for you about how the other half lives... Let me know?
  Thanks
  --Denise Amos
  

QT - Meguey <qtopic+27-dHgx53cebeTW@quicktopic.com> wrote:



We can complain because rose bushes have thorns,
  or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.
  ~~Abraham Lincoln

 
---------------------------------
Access over 1 million songs - Yahoo! Music Unlimited.
< replied-to message removed by QT >

Hi Denise and Julia! Welcome to MotherWoman.

Denise, our next Journal is focused Mothering and Depression - if you are willing write a 1/2 page 'journal entry' about what it's like for you, or your fears for your kids, or anything around the issue, we'd love to consider it for publication. You are so very much not alone in your experiences.

Julia, there are other MotherWoman moms in Vermont - mostly in the Brattelborugh area. Come down some time!

-Meguey
MW site admin

Hello,
I was directed to this site by my family counselor. Jamie said that I was not alone in my feelings of distrusting myself and my abilities to raise my daughters without damaging them. I have depression, panic & anxiety disorder and at times anger that wells up from I don't know where and transforms me into a raving lunatic that I do not recognize. Mostly everything is kept in check with meds, but there are times each month that nothing will stop my hormonal shifts from taking over. I am an older mom with two girls 3 & 7...I have such fear that they will grow up to dislike me, but perhaps be exactly like me... I'd love to chat with other moms that have anger/rage/depression/insecurity issues.
--Denise
West Virginia
Mom of two girls & wife to a terrific man

Hello,

I found you through Mothering.com email about Motherhood Manifesto - followed a couple of links to your site, and saw you were right below me in Northhampton, MA. I only wish, for the first time ever, that I didn't live in Vermont, and lived in Western Massachusetts, as your organization is exactly what kind of org I would like to get involved with, in a big way.

I would love to do something like this in Vermont, as it is much needed, as the climate for birthing and motherhood is in an abyssmal state. Maybe someone would have some contacts up here if something is in the works ? I'd like to stay in touch via this board if it was OK with MotherWoman.

Everything about your programs is like a dream: mother's soul support, PPD support, writing, even something for homeschooling moms. I just couldn't believe how wonderful it seems. Maybe I'll take a trip down there someday for a program.

Julia Riell
Poultney, Vermont
HS mother of two daughters, partner of Stu.

Ellen. I'm thrilled to hear from someone from Australia! I'm so glad you're still in touch with us. Big changes to the website soon. So stay tuned! We have great things happening! Thanks for spreading the word.
Melanie DeSilva- Admin. Director

It's Ellen Unruh here writing from Australia, formerly from Leverett. Thank god you guys are up on the web now -- I've been missing my MotherWoman! A special hello to Shannon! I'm forwarding your info to a motherwoman here in Canberra who runs a very special woman's group, longstanding for 25 years and doing great stuff. Best, E.

All issues are up! Still working on PDFs.

Issues 7 and 3 are live, and pics from Apple Harvest are up! Info on Mom's Night Out as soon as I get it from Annette.

Visuals in the form of pics from Apple Harvest will be up ASAP!

Website works great on my MAC Meg- good job! Now the home page needs photos and "visuals"- this motivates me to get the work on my own page now. Hugs!

Edited by author 10-03-2004 06:23 PM
Hurrah for setting up this essential place that we can turn to for inspiration and insight! To keep myself sane, I've been involved in a couple of MotherWoman (8-week) groups, the MW "Continuous Journey" meetings, and the MW facilitator training, and yet I always wanted a place for us to connect online. Thanks a million! I know it will make a difference for many, many women.

Welcome to the MotherWoman Circle! Feel free to leave public notes relating to anything about MotherWoman Inc., the MotherWoman Journal, or MotherWoman stuff in general here. For submissions and registrations, go back to www.motherwoman.org and contact us. Thanks!