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"Planeswalkers" get on Boeing 707s, drink lots of those tiny bottles of Smirnoff vodka, then repeatedly go to the bathroom.

Also, their eyes are square.

What the hell is a Planeswalker, anyway? Is it like a Landstander?

And here Bill demonstrates the true difference between humans and animals: Only we have the capacity to download hentai.

Good news from the Gray homestead: Dad and I have said "To Hell with this Atkin's shit!" Which is especially good for him as he's already lost one kidney to cancer. Mom's staying on it, but she'll be safe because she's never been able to stick to a diet.

Of course, Gray isn't really my last name. It's going to be my psuedonym when/if I ever get published. I thought it was pretty clever and original until I read the last two Harry Potter books and found a character named Lavender Brown. Apparently J.K. and I have our own sympathetic magic going on.

I think Gray sounds better than Brown anyway.

This isn't Canada Day--
IT'S DEAD DAVEY DAY!! DEAD DAVEY DAY!!!! DEAD DAVEY DAAAAAY!!!!!!!!

http://livewire.keenspace.com/

CRAP. He's not dead at ALL! He's just downloading hentai.

There was a fad diet among the aristocracy of the (I think) late 18th Century, which involved eating the severed heads of tapeworms. More "sympathetic magic" than science, obviously.

(It also didn't work. Well, fancy that!)

Edited by author 07-01-2004 10:27 PM
"I'll have to research this kidneys/protein thing. Hm..."

http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/diet.fitnes...end.reut/index.html

""Losing weight on these extreme low-carb diets can lead to such serious health problems as kidney stress, liver disorders and gout," the group advises."

Gout? I thought that was something only people from Dickens' time got.

Must..resist.. mentioning the thing where tapeworm eggs being sold as miracle.. diet pills.. too cliche.. argh..

I don't agree at you saying 'frikin' whales. they are long ago known to have some sort of communication between themselves. i just feel you say in a demeaning way, when most whales are smarter than the average people who lives in trailer parks.

Edited by author 07-01-2004 09:08 PM
After learning about tapeworms in biology class, I always wanted to get one implanted and see what good it would do me :)

Hey, maybe all the brown in my tap water would do me good! It could be like... fiber... or an alien life form... or rust! I need iron.

I'll have to research this kidneys/protein thing. Hm...

Edit - Gotta argue on the "humans have the gift of speech" thing too.... Just because we don't understand cows doesn't mean they don't have speech. They obviously understand each other. Cats, dogs, BIRDS, frickin' whales, they all communicate. It's not farting, it's SPEECH. We really aren't that special after all.

"Bet you can't rip off Beowulf without people noticing."

Well, i read the book (and hence the disclaimer he wrote at the end explaining everything) a while ago, but ya, i think that was basically it.

Oh, by the way, a Merry Canada Day to yez all.

All the merrier given the election results-- the Liberals (centrist) got a minority win, and the party they'll have to lean on to avoid non-confidence votes is mainstream leftist. *sigh* The next 3-24 months should be pretty good. That's about as long as minority governments last around here.

Edited by author 07-01-2004 10:51 AM
Zef: he wrote it because of a bet. The bet was, of course, "Bet you can't rip off Beowulf without people noticing." Friggin' hack. That story was old before Islam was invented, never mind having adherents wandering into the frozen north. I still like The Andromeda Strain, tho'.

Lavender: White ain't right Surely the mighty protein and fat content of white Mr. Tofu will please the great god Atkins and his prophets (Phil and Oprah). You might point out to the family that even obligatory carnivores like... CATS! will occasionally eat too much protein for their kidneys to deal with. I've lately been enjoying a cereal called "Hemp Plus Granola" (no idea how the accent falls), which has plenty of protein in it, and thanks to an inclusion of flax seeds, masses of fibre.

Bill: On the recent musings de re Felis Catus and other critters. I'm reading a book called The Tribe of Tiger (Elizabeth M. Thomas), which is essentially a sociology thesis on cats, and in it she writes of a lion she was once menaced by which made a point of not looking directly at her when a flashlight swung in it's direction. It would look near enough that it wasn't trying to avoid being dazzled-- it had apparently worked out that it's eyes shone in the dark, and it was easier to sneak up on the ground-apes if it didn't present eyeballs to a light source. This discovery could only come from observing OTHER lions and pondering it's own lion-ness....

Of course, animals can't build cruise missiles, so we're still special. It says so in The Bible, which we all know is NOT AT ALL a collection of possibly useful stories by a variety of guys with personal and political agendas specific to the Middle East in the Bronze Age. Yep. Special.

Edited by author 07-01-2004 12:33 AM
I wish i could go on a diet. i don't eat at home, but at grandma's, and that's carb house with lots of tortillas and bread. (no, i don't have the will to don't eat them. they'd have to be absent)

Well, i reread Sphere last night, and Crichton writes that basically the only difference between humans and animals is that we have imagination, and that it propels us. (yes, i know his stuff is fiction, but there's always a heavy researched real scientific background behind every novel.. that's why i got miffed with him after reading Eaters of the dead which was fascinating and full of facts, but entirely fiction. he wrote it because of a bet)

Mum tried the ol' Atkins diet, and she really felt horrible after a short duration too. So she just started eating sensibly and cut out sweets, and she's excersizing too, and she's lost about 80 LB.

A flameup of Crohn's had my brother lose a pile of weight quickly. we had no idea he had it...

Atkins is basically meat, meat, and more meat. The most bizarre rule is that "white ain't right" meaning baked potatoes, my favorite meat substitute, is supposed to be off limits. Also bananas and cereal and grapes and such. After three days of semi-following this, I'm already so exhausted that I have to lie on the ground and roll where I want to go.

"...either WSFTP is down and not letting me upload it, or I'm royally D--- Cheney'd."

Well, you DID cast aspersions on the noble tradition of burning lumps of sulphurous carbon as a means of... er... making a few bucks, I guess. Noble pursuit of the wiley spondoolix is not to be treated lightly (see USAPARTIDIOT act, Sec. 755, sub.iib), with penalties which may include but are not limited to projection by catapult.