In class today, as part of the discussion, I made the comment that "being overweight doesn't matter," to which Dr. Fisanick responded with allusions to various studies and such that have been done and seem to prove that being overweight DOES invite some unwelcome and unfair treatment by others.
 I, too, have read about those experiments, and don't deny that Yes, indeed there is a valid case for and strong evidence to support the fact that Society as a whole looks down upon its heavier members. The point I was making (or trying to make)was meant more on an individualistic basis, in that the REAL people who come into our lives and become close as friends, peers, co-workers etc. will accept us for WHO we are, not HOW we are. But, again, I do realize that far too many people "steer clear" of others who seem less-than-attractive for whatever reason, weight of course being one of them. And it's a damn shame, because there are some really cool people being unfairly ignored or snubbed.
 Finally, in reading the essays, and during the class discussion today, I was reminded (but not surprised) that all too often, one thoughtless remark can really send someone reeling down a path toward either obesity or anorexia. I just hope that somewhere along the way I have not done so--I mean, I have to 'fess up and say that when I was a child, I mercilessly joined the bandwagon of teasing heavier kids . . . but in all fairness, I suffered my own deluge of torment for other reasons and often wonder if something that was said to or about me still has residual effects of which I'm not consciously aware. I sincerely hope none of my remarks or behaviors still haunts anyone; all I realized at the time was that if I could help keep everyone picking on someone else, I was at least temporarily spared.

Kathy makes a very good point. At the end you talked about teasing others to avoid getting teased yourself. I think that is a common thread with most kids. In the schools I attended, 80% of the people took their fair share of ribbing. Fortunately, no one took ALL of the butt of everyone's jokes. At least for eating disorders, it seems that adolescence and the universal concern with weight are a fatal combination. Even though usually no one is the butt of all the jokes, adolescents typically have a self-centered view of the world. Everyone probably isn't making fun of them or marginalizing them all of the time, but when you are an adolescent, it often times seems like that. Adolescents who have eating disorders have more of a problem of the psychological sometimes, which I believe was mentioned in class today. Children can be brought up by parents who are always accusatory of everything a child eats, and as a result, the child may grow up to think that everyone is watching them, trying to get them. Therefore, at the risk of alienation and being acused of speaking about a subject that i could NEVER know anything about, I believe that eating disorders are not weight concern taken to extreme proportions (excuse the eating pun), but instead, outside concerns complicated by a common concern about weight.

Edited by author 01-21-2004 05:10 PM
Paul, I completely agree with you that eating disorders are not about weight. I'm going to further reiterate the point we made in class today. Eating disorders are definitely about control. If for no other reason an eating disorder allows a typcially in control person to make up for the lack of control they feel in one area of their life. This is why, what Lauren brought up in class is so true. Many of the individuals who suffer from eating disorders are very intelligent, driven and perfectionists. However, these ideals are taken to the extremes of unhealthy behavior and the same person who is driven to get straight A's in school is also just as determined to starve themselves to death. Not that the other readings have not been powerful, but I think today's readings were very emotional and they stirred alot of emotions in me, as I'm sure they did in everyone else. "Life Size" was one of the most brilliant yet disturbing pieces I have ever read. Does anyone know if the author herself was an anorexic? Was that her story? Just curious. Have a great night everyone!

after reading the essay "Life Size," i was, to say the least disturbed and confused. It is difficult for me to wrap my mind around such an extreme behavior. it is hard for me to understand such a serious mental shift and emotional struggle in which someone sees food as the enemy- but like many of you have said, it IS all about control. although the case is not nearly as extreme, this prompted thoughts of my friend in high school who had an eating disorder. every day at lunch she ate half of her yogurt, water, and maybe a handful of pretzels. these habits were not strnage at first, until her weight started plummeting and everyone around her could see what was going on. he slowly lost more and more weight, everyday obessing about working out and eating less than the day before. She has gained her weight back as a result of college (drinking, studying, and sleeping). like i said before- i know this isn't such an extreme case- but still, to this day, she will not have a meal without commenting on the calorie intake, how much she's been eating lately, etc. she is my old roomate and going to the grocery store with her, trying to compromise on food, was like pulling teeth. finally, i said "Ok, you get your fat free cheese and I'll get my junk food and we'll call it even." after reading this peice and discussing weight issues in class, i have realized something about my friend- i dont know where this osession with control came from, but i still see it today in her eating and in other aspects of her life. she sees gorging on chocolate cake as unreasonable and appalling, i see it as an indulgement.

I know that I put song lyrics in here last week but I couldn't help doing it again. While reading "Life Size" the only way that I could participate in it was by remembering an article I read about Daniel Johns, the lead singer of Silverchair. He battled anorexia and wrote the song "Ana's Song" about this battle:
Please die Ana
For as long as you're here we're not
You make the sound of laughter
And sharpened nails seem softer
And I need you now somehow
And I need you now somehow
Open fire on the needs designed on my knees for you
Open fire on my knees desires what I need from you
Imagine pageant
In my head the flesh seems thicker
Sandpaper tears corrode the film
And I need you now somehow
And I need you now somehow
Open fire on the needs designed on my knees for you
Open fire on my knees desires what I need from you
And your my obsession
I love you to the bones
And Ana wrecks your life
Like an anorexia life
Open fire on the need designed on my knees for you....
Open fire on my knees desires what I need from you
Open fire on my needs designed
Oh, and
Open fire on the needs designed on my knees for you

Why I find this important is because here is a man that is successful in societal terms, and yet he was still fighting the battle of control, which he found the only thing he could control was food. I wish that I could say that I didn't fight for control, but I think we all do and I know that some of the things that I have deemed as control aren't the healthiest things for my body. It's frightening to think though that sometimes the one thing you are trying to control starts to actually control you.

Quite frankly, I am sick of the constant talk from friends, family and society on weight issues. I believe it is a moslty frivolous topic. I do not want to make it seem that I am insensitive to people with weight problems (over or under), because it can be a serious, serious condition. Weight problems are typically more than meets the eye and those definitely need to be addressed. But- it is the fad diets and magic bullet drugs that aggravate me the most. They feed on people's insecurities and perpetuate the ideal icons, which then lead society to believe that they are supposed to strive for those bodies and those bodies alone. These ploys and supplements are severely unhealthy and yet people believe that these tactics are the answers to their prayers. What society and people at large fail to realize is that their phenotype (in this case weight and body shape) is a combination of genetics and environment. Americans lead a certain lifestyle and that promotes certain habits. In order to change those habits, one must change their lifestyle. And by that I mean this- people complain about their weight constantly and swear up and down that they have done all that they could, but nothing has worked. I beg to differ- there are things that have been proven to work, but only if the person is willing to make those changes and as Oprah and her fitness guru have coined the phrase "get with the program" and stick with it. Exercise is the number one way to get in shape and eating in moderation is key. There doesn't have to be those diets where you neglect yourself of anything- carbs, proteins, fats, sweets, etc.- have them all, but work them off and don't have too much of one thing. People also have to realize that there is a spectrum of body shapes and if your bone structure is formed a certain way there is no natural method to make that any different. Instead of weight workshops there should be confidence workshops about your body and weight. The numbers (pounds) do not matter. What matters is people's health and fitness in order to live a long wonderful life. Obsessing about weight is not going to do anything. A friend of mine is what the media would call "plump," but she works out more than anyone I know- she has a very low percentage of body fat and her lean muscle mass is through the roof. Yet, because she fills out her clothing a certain way, she is considered "overweight." Such nonsense! Though, the greatest thing about that is that she does not adhere to those irrational standards of society, so she does not give a hoot about any of that- nor should she. Another friend of mine is plump. Her eating habits are unhealthy, she drinks too much beer and then complains about her weight. Could she drop a few pounds? Yes, but only if she wants to make those changes. She will never be able to attain what pop culture has made out to be the "ideal body", but I contend there is no such thing anyway. However, she does have within her the power to make herself healthy. And that to me is the bottom line. I may not be 5'11" with legs up to high heaven, but I am healthy and that should be the most important question we all ask ourselves. Am I healthy? Not will I be able to gain/lose weight to look like someone we are not and never going to be. We know our bodies and they do a lot of work for us. We should not have to put it through the unnecessary stress of weight obsession. We should be rational in what we can expect and be congruent with our bodies' needs. There is so much going on in our bodies and if it quits on us, well it's not going to really matter if we reached our weight goal. Being healthy should be our aim, not a number.

First of all I have to say that I really found these several postings really interestings, especially the lyric posting. But I guess in order to add my own thoughts or opinions to this particular topic I would have to simply say that I have taken more out of Body Outlaws then Minding the Body simply from the standpoint that I feel it is written for those who do and do not suffer from eating and weight issues. I felt the book gave both types of readers confidence in themselves to the extent that it showed that the personal experiences of these women writers have seen their fears and are willing to admitt that they overcame the impossible which for some of us is still an uphill battle wether it be not just physical weight but emotional weight as well. I really enjoyed some of the comments made in class yesterday regarding the fact that even thin people go through the same expectations as over weight people in that they are supposed to jump on the band wagon and are supposed to have a distaste for food in general. Anyway, in closing I just felt that for the most part, which class discussion and this book proves, we are all in the same boat as far as issues with weight are concerned and it seems as though in our own ways the emotional issues of the underweight and overweight person are one in the same.

Wow, these are all very isightful postings. It seems that the story "Life Sized" really got to everyone. It hit home with me as well, I have a sister who is currently battling this disease, and it is one of the worst things to watch. For her, it is also not about weight, as Paul suggested. It is about much deeper issues. Though I hate to start putting blame on guys, it is her ex-fiance who brought this out in her. I sa he brought it out because the insecurity has always been there, but I think it took his nasty comments and hurtful words that made her act on those deeper feelings of control. The other story that had a great impact on me was "Out of habit, I start apologizing". This one made a lot of sense to me. As I wrote in my journal, I realized that while I am a singer and a dancer, I like my body much better when dancing or doing things like Yoga. During singing, I am actually forced to increase the size of my body but extending my diaphragm and rib cage. This never occured to me before but I would much rather dance in front of a mirror than sing. Those are the words I hate to hear from my voice instructor, "move in front of the mirror so you can watch yourself". I hope that is something I can overcome in the near future.

Edited by author 01-23-2004 12:53 PM
In the essay “Out of Habit I Start Apologizing”, the author wrote “I should have loved my body better”. This struck something in me. It made me question whether or not I really love my body. Sure, I say I do but I do not really take the time to show it. The author was constantly involved in physically straining activities. Most people, when they speak about taking care of yourself often mean exercising. But is that really loving your body, or does it more closely reasonable physical punishment. It hurts! My mother always taught me that love doesn’t hurt. Society stresses the importance of caring for our bodies all the time. But do they really mean “loving” it. Is loving your body going on horrible diets that make you suffer from starvation and make you have to run to the rest room twenty times a day. Is making the decision to love your body to start exercising. Or is exercising ultimately changing your body into something that you want to love. I think that I have been loving my body for superficial reasons, not taking the time to ask her what she wants. Of course I give myself mental stimulation, but I often over look taking care of her. We often criticize women for starving themselves to death, and yes I agree that it isn’t about physical appearance. We ask how they can suffer from such an intense lack of love for themselves. Do we know if that is the case? Maybe they believe that they are trying to love their inner selves by trying to get it the attention that it has been denied. Clearly they are calling out of something. Obviously they can not be loving their bodies unconditionally, the way that we all should. But how many of us REALLY are? I hope that you guys don't think that I am anti-exercise, its just somehting to think about.

"Life-Size" seems to have dominated discussion this week, and rightedly so. It was disturbingly insightful. In class, we discussed how oftentimes, eating disorders are formed, in part, because of a need for control. There is a quote in this essay which I think alludes to that need: "Fine with me. I don't want any involuntary responses; soon, in this body, everything will be willed"(254). I always wonder where this need for control comes from, how it is initiated in the mind. I've heard it said that people cannot imagine having an eating disorder because they cannot imagine loving themselves that little. There is something that has always bothered me about that statement because it seems to inherently blame the victim of an eating disorder. ("She only got that because she didn't love herself enough.") As Amber said, who really does love their body enough? It seems like such a difficult task, to warmly embrace and accept everything that society, critical parents, catty friends remind us are imperfections. I know that I am still learning to love my body better.

As I read many of the comments, I too was really disturbed by "Life-Size". As I stated in class on Wednesday, what happens to someone to make them feel that they no longer want to exist. The very things that should be done to survive are the very things that disgusted the author. Where was Jenefer's mother, or any other positive female role models in her life. Sometimes I can be an emotional person and it really moved me to tears to think that those who battle with eating disorders feel like Jenefer. I mean she was really focusing on making sure that her bones were protuding out of her, and making sure that the skin around her buttocks or hips, I think it was, was firm. I am thankful for this class, the readings and discussions, because as a mother of two, all of the above mentioned components are helping me to be on my toes to make sure that I teach my daughter to love herself no matter what anyone else thinks or says. I also enjoyed the article "Sizing Myself Up: Tales of a Plus Size Model" because it is a slap in the face to the modeling industry and how they have presented what is woman. I once heard that the average sized woman is a size 14, and not the superfical size 2. So what if some of us are a little overweight it means there is more of us to love and more to go around. I like what Kate said when she was asked if she felt embarrassed working with those persons who knew her when she was skinny. He response is what we have to teach our ladies today, to never feel ashamed of who they are or how they look, but spend time focusing on learning to be comfortable with who they are and how they look. Women or men don't have to go around comparing themselves to anyone else just be YOU, and LOVE YOU because no one else can love you better.

free Ana.
The real fight starts here today,

We must get anorexia to go away,

Anorexia causes us so much pain,

But for what?

What do we really gain?

A life where we would rather die,

A lonely life but we must try

To lead a life

Which is not full of fear?

Do we really need anorexia here?

And although the fight may be hard and long,

We will win if we just stay strong!

And then one day,

Both you and me,

One day I know we

Will all be FREE!!