I AM HAVING PROBLEMS WITH NINJA GAIDEN SIGMA, I'VE BEEN STUCK AT THE SAME DAMN SPOT FOR THE PAST MONTH HOPIN ID GET PASSED THIS LEVEL BUT I CANT, PLEASE CAN ANYONE HELP?

Alert for all travellers to North America: Abuse of Human Rights and Privacy Violations:

Racially intolerant white canadian cops and security and their henchmen claim to be despots; following parasitically in the footsteps of their american counterparts, and wilfully engage in their racial profiling of non-whites, in racial harassment of non-whites, and in racially dehumanizing attempts to racially harass non-whites through intimidating physically, mentally, and spiritually; portraying their racial hatred of non-whites through causing wilfull and dehumanizing disturbance to non-whites through using illegal wall-see-through technologies and audio-bugs on non-whites' homes; through listening and watching through the walls of non-whites' rented and owned homes, and through their internet and private telephones. The perpetuators of these evil deeds do this from their cars using illegal equipment slyly given to them by the unworthy cops, and then accelerating their cars loudly and intimidatingly near non-whites' homes and driving intimidatingly in presence of non-whites on streets, making threatening u-turns, driving intimidatingly right up and over sidewalks when a non-white is on the sidewalk, and throwing their ugly bullying weight around, in their shameless acts of cowardice. It is all done slyly, supposedly smartly, however, they cannot fool all the people all the time. The cops also participate themselves to wail their sirens abusively everytime non-whites move and talk inside their rented and owned homes in daily routine living, in addition to having their henchmen, and often, using their non-white gutless henchmen in cars, transport, shopping centers, neighborhoods, etc, to commit these ugly harassing racially profiling deeds at all times day and night. Using non-whites to engage in racial harassment of other non-whites is an obnoxiously evil sinister humanely disgraceful intelligent move of the whites well-known for their ugly divide and rule tactics through their non-white henchmen. It's a shameful disgrace when the so called protectors of law turn into abusers of law themselves and throw the weight of their uniforms and law around. So, they and their henchmen, appear to be very law respecting on the outside; however, they network cowardly to commit sly acts of provocation to non-whites all the time, which is supposed to be legally acceptable. Is watching through walls of non-whites homes, bugging their homes, working in networking syndicates against them, committing human rights and privacy violations against them, supposedly lawful for the whites? Who makes those laws that favor only the whites? The law itself has racism in its clauses. The ugly inner dirt of the perpetuators of these evil deeds of racism do not deserve to step into religious institutions for their ugly deeds - such as, if you ain't white, you ain't right? Oh! Really? Nicely dressed, beautiful people, magnificient concrete jungles, clean roads and lawns, sweet polite talkers on the outside, full of ugly stench in their souls, that is the cause of these racist policies that are outrightly biased against non-whites. What a shame! Most of these ugly acts of dehumanizing racial profiling depict the cowardice of the doers of these deeds in the real sense, and are done at the behind the scenes insistence of the racially intolerant white cops through their frontline stooges. However, without physical evidence, the white cops, security, socieities, and their henchmen are laughing sinisterly at their heinous deeds and the legal system seems to support this evil through its inability to take action without physical evidence. Their racial profiling penetrates public transport systems, shops and stores to do all they can to make the non-whites feel unwelcome in their dehumanizing acts of racial profiling against non-whites and those who don't conform to their nonsense. The white cops, security, and white communities use their henchmen who do just as they are told and from behind the safety cushion of their oil-guzzling, pollution creating, often dark-glassed vehicles to intimidate and harass non-whites in obnoxious racial profiling that reflects the immoral, despotic, and cowardly behaviour of racially intolerant white cops, security, communities and their dumb henchmen who do just as they are told, fuelled as they are in their racial frenzy, thanks to the racially manipulative corporate controlled media.

For more information, visit:

http://www.yourluckytoday.blogspot.com

Volunteers are welcome to circulate this information to all they know to put an end to this abuse and violations of human rights committed by immorally misbehaved white cops, security, white communities, public transports, shops, stores, etc, and their dumb henchmen who do just as they are told in their racial frenzy.

Save this information on your computers before any cowards remove it from the websites.

Racism is immoral and dehumanizing behaviour that reflects the "incapable to perform humanely" quality of those who are racist and are being watched from God's court above in ways they cannot be expected to be capable to perceive yet.

It's a shame when obnoxious stench of racism comes from people in so called rich countries. It's even more of a shame when words are twisted by media to influence young minds with lies. It's even more of a shame when so called authorities perpetuate racism and behave racistly and enforce racist policies and behaviour through intimidating means amidst outer sweet and polite talks. Racism seems to be prominent among so called white people in rich countries who cannot bear non-whites from other countries of origin. Planet Earth belongs to people of Earth. Highly educated people of high intellectual calibres, rich bosses and CEOs, etc, of rich countries are a blotch on humanity and their material levels when they haven't yet evolved to basic human concepts of all humans have red blood irrespective of race.

Racism stems from social attitudes that are perpetuated by racist societies, the media, the authoritarians, and the peers. It's time to say, shame on all those who perpetuate racism and racist attitudes.


Thank you.

Update: No update.

Dudes, that was like having sex for the first time -- I had only the vaguest idea where anything went. Will try again tonight.

Cross your fingers

Check back later this afternoon. I am trying working out the final kinks in the redesign and getting ready to switch us over.


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That too could be a topic header - things you can abuse for personal reasons. You could move the Frey comments there, for example.

Happy birthday, Lady Ninja!

One of the perks of having your own blog is that you get to abuse it for personal reasons.


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Now now, George. We antiquated grammarians do not take kindly to sarcasm. You never know what fearful retribution might be in store for you if you tease us. Beware the wrath of the pointy pencil brigade!!!!

It's a good thing you caught that. Armageddon averted, people. Whew. I'm going to leave it intact, like a body hung in a rusting cage from a castle battlement, as a lesson to future grammatical mistakes that would threaten the fabric of society.

G

Happy New Year, Ninjas! And let me be the first to suggest your New Year's Resolution: to scrutinize all postings for invasive apostrophes. The possessive "its" does not take an apostrophe. Thank you kindly.

Another year, another dollar

Well, we're back. Hope you are too. I spent much of the holidays working on a new front- and back-end for the site, along with a trusty mercenary-type to be named later, but alas, nothing to show yet. Have you ever tried to install Apache Server and all it's helper bots on your Windows XP Home machine from 2000? Don't. Anyway, it'll be a bit, so you're stuck with the old site until then. Also, to those of you hoping for another searing round of the Golden Shuriken Awards... Meh. I looked back over the last year and, while there was certainly the usual idiocy and ridiculous behaviour we've come to know and respect from the book industry, I just didn't have the vitriol in me to point it out. My bile levels are dangerously low. In all, glad to have you with us. We'll turn three this year, should we make it to the summer, and we're finally starting to act our age. So please hang around and tell your friends about us.


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Happy new year, Bookninja. Best wishes to all you ninjas. I hope to run into more of you this year.

Bookninjas--

Thanks for the Christmas Days calendar. Hope you all have a Bing Crosby kind of Christmas.

Love, Derek

Edited by author 12-20-2005 10:51 AM
Taking a break

Okay, little ninjas. Have you all been good this past year? I know you haven't. Don't lie to me, you smart-mouthed brats. I know! I said, I KNOW, MOFOS! You can't lie to me! I know and see all. And I'm proud of you. But now we Bookninjas have to go to our secret hideout in the deep north where we will scheme, drink, and manufacture a line of razor sharp toys and poisonous doodads for all the good little boys and girls who read the site. (Just to make you jealous.. Last night, I unwrapped a gi ft... Guess what it was?! Woohoo!)

We may update occasionally over the next two weeks, but will certainly not be regular. As you might have guessed, I can be a little obsessive about the posting, so there might be a few things up here and there, as time, turkey and tobogganing permit. The stress of dealing with family (as opposed to "dealing" with family) means that each of us will likely spend most of the next two weeks in a slightly vegetative state; pickled, as it were. Ah. Booze as defence mechanism... The great Canadian Yuletide tradition. Why do you Yanks think we're all so pleasant?

But look for a full return in early January with, Santa-permitting, a redesign of the site. Think RSS feeds. Also, keep an eye out for a New Year's gift in the magazine. And don't forget that the Derek McCormack / Seth Christmas Days excerpts will continue to run, just like an advent calendar, right up until the 24th. So, a very Merry Hanukkah and a Happy Christmas to you. Try to love.


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Thanks, Chris.
You know, it sounds like hyperbole, but in his last years Sheldon was a very sick man and the only thing that kept him going was poetry. I found him an inspiration. Everyone else is always worried about sales and reputation; he just wanted to write another good poem.

Susan, thanks for the nice piece on Sheldon Zitner in _Books in Canada_. I barely knew him, but heard marvellous stories about the man and his academic career before I ever heard he wrote poetry. Nice to see that he was given his due.

If only you guys weren't so entertaining I might get some work done. Happy Birthday!

Susan Glickman

ps. Do tell us more about the incipient advertising program. My first novel's coming out this spring, and my perusal of sites like Bookangst 101, Buzz Balls and Hype, and Maud Newton has convinced me that I oughta get out there and shake my booty rather than leaving things up to my overworked literary press.....

congrats team! awesome work!

Happy Birthday to Us

In one day we three are two. Our first public post was August 13, 2003. Pete and I started things (Kathryn joined us this year, much to our relief) as a way to keep in touch with friends over long distances, and word of mouth has snowballed us into an internationally recognized portal for lit news. The site is read by thousands of people daily: publishing folk, writers, and regular old booklovers. We're now considered one of the best lit news sites in the world, having received kudos and mentions in virtually every major Canadian paper as well as international markets such as the Boston Globe, the Denver Post, New York Newsday, Time Magazine, among others.

The Complete Review says it best:

"Previously outrageously overlooked in this survey because of Bookninja's far-reaching ambit (i.e. we always categorised it as a large literary site that merely incidentally had a weblog), but since 2004 it has easily become one of the leading weblogs, with extensive links and commentary. There's a slight Canadian focus, but coverage ranges far and wide, and there's no question that Bookninja has become a must-visit literary weblog."

Sweet! So, we're looking for ideas for articles, reviews, etc. If you have any, please approach us. We're three very busy people who have less and less time to do this kind of thing. If you're interested in writing for us, or contributing in any way, just drop us a note and we'll get in touch.

Look for ninja-related changes this fall, including a new advertising program providing EXTREMELY affordable space to individual writers promoting individual books. (We've been losing sleep with the guilt of our advertising successes, and you're the one to benefit!)

As a grassroots kind of site, we have mainly our contributors and readers to thank for our success. So thanks for reading and sticking with us all this time, and for coming back day after long gruelling day. And tell your friends thanks too, after you tell them to come visit.


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Jennings, send me your mailing address. And email address, for that matter.

G

I agree that Beautiful Losers is much more interesting than Favourite Game, and vice versa, if considered in comparison to much of the boring safe crap pumped lately. Gimme Double Hook and Coming Through Slaughter already. Stop boring me to death with flash fiction without heart, flashing now into 3000 words+ per ego-jerk...followed by whining.

<Puts cookie on pitbull's nose>

Wait for it...! Wait for it...!

<Hits pitbull with rolled-up magazine and runs>

Dude, The Favourite Game is so much better. BL is an interesting failure of a novel.

Cruel summer

Okay, kids. It's fucking hot. I'm taking this week off. If I happen to wake before seven on any given day, I may pop in and post something, but otherwise, colour me rested. You're in the hands of my fellow shadowy warlords.

I usually take some time off in August, but we have several major pieces for the magazine coming up then, including: a blogger all-star (Maud Newton, Michael Schaub, and myself) review/reappraisal of Leonard Cohen's Beautiful Losers, a discussion of the "new" poetics of form by Ian LeTourneau and John Lofranco, an inverse omnibus review of the Romentics line of gay romance novels by Dani Couture and Matthew Fox, and an in depth comparison of the writing life in the "scene" versus roughing it in the bush by Brenda Schmidt. Until then, I plan to be irregular. Bran flakes or no.


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Excuses

I am alone this week, with Peter still on honeymoon and Kathryn on vacay in Nova Scotia, so things are slow this week. We're off Friday for Canada Day too (like Independence Day but the fireworks are illegal and represent pretty colours instead of the the rocket's red glare). Plus, nerd that I am, tonight I am getting my telescope fixed and I can barely think of anything else. You know, those kooky scientists are going to smash a probe into a comet this weekend. Coooool.


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You all have no idea how much I've won here. I've cashed in all my favours till kingdom come.

I'm being forced to amend my first post. The original comment was not "hate-mail" it was just the humor of an angry (because G-love moved away) black (half actually) lesbian. Now I'm even angrier because I'm being forced to type this long-ass post while recovering from a hangover after four days of NYC pride activities.

You're just mad I moved away. I was the white Irish boy who made you cool.

you're an ass!

Bookninja's first mention in Time

The 50 coolest websites. Naw, not us, but apparently we make The Complete Review cool. We're like the black, lesbian friend of cool websites. (Thanks, Michael)


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congrats!

awwww, the cuteness.

Congratulations!

Edited by author 06-20-2005 11:23 PM

It's not like you're losing a daughter... it's like your gaining a highly skilled assassin...

Oh. My. God. I promised myself I wasn't going to cry... Woo. I just can't help it. Congratulations to Peter and Elaine, married this weekend past in Toronto. My Lady Ninja finally has someone to head to the Little Ninja's Room with, for the powdering of noses, sharpening of tanto blades and dispersion of caltrops.

Pictured above: George "My-Head-Feels-Like-Minced-Meat" Murray on left, Jonathan "Anybody-Got-a-Tissue?" Bennett on right, and Peter "I-Can't-Believe-She-Fell-For-It" Darbyshire in centre.


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very nice.

Whew!

Much better. Thanks, George.

Um, yeah, don't like the Fontzilla font from yesterday...

Okay, how's this one?


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Oh how I love Mozilla...

...and the headline reads, "blog user crushed by monster font."

Further, if you're using Firefox, and you should be, you can just hit Ctrl + to increase and Ctrl - to decrease.

G

Dear Everybody,

You can customize the size of your font. Click on the "View" tab at the top of your browser window and go from there. Take the power back, people!

TOO BIG!

Shiznit foshizzle!
The problem is that the font you have looks horrible when it's that big. Maybe a different font?

The new size works for me. I usually view sites at 90%. That was fine for the forum pages but too small for the main site. Now both look good at 90.

Way too big.

Edited by author 05-16-2005 10:31 AM
Too big! My scroll finger's fatigued already.

Oh man, I hafto stand 50 metres away from the screen to cope with that monster font!

Edited by author 05-15-2005 10:39 PM
Survey results...

Okay, the results are in and: you like us! You really like us! Give me a bit to run some stats on what we got (hundreds of responses, thank you). But one semi-common suggestion for improvement was to make the font bigger. (It's a matter of your screen resolution, people. Likely, those of you working on newer computers have a higher screen resolution and therefore things appear smaller to you. You probably also get a whole bunch of white space to the right of the skyscraper ad. If you had a lower screen resolution, you'd find things looked bigger and you'd likely have no white space. It's a please some of the people some of the time thing, but I thought I'd try it out.) I'm going to try this size for a few days. If you have an opinion on it one way or t'other, please feel free to post it here: (discuss). I personally think it looks like shiznit, so if after a bit my inner designer still hates it, I reserve the right to reverse the changes and force you old-fogies back to squinting.


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One day more

Last chance to fill out the Bookninja survey today. Thanks to those who already have. A few things already become apparent and don't need further analysis to act on. Look for a larger font next week, if we can do it and maintain the integrity of the design. I love even my myopic readers, you old coots.


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State of the site survery, Day 2

Thanks to all those who filled out the state of the site survey we posted yesterday. If you haven't had a go at it yet, please fill it out here. We'll leave it up the rest of the week in this top spot and perhaps post some of the results next week. It's been interesting so far, and your comments have been very generous. Thanks.


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State of the Site: Bookninja survey

Hi, guys. Can you take a few minutes (our timing is seven minutes) to fill out this Bookninja survey? It's designed to provide us with a snapshot of our reader-base so we can better plan future changes, advertising, and events. It's the kind of thing we need to have on hand now that this site, which started as a thing between a few friends, is snowballing into a full-grown business. Like I said, it's only a few minutes and we would greatly appreciate hearing from you. Rest assured, it's all anonymous. Thanks in advance.


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Having some ftp problems. Will try to load the main page later this morning. Sorry, G

Edited by author 04-17-2005 03:20 PM
Congratulations to Ninja Kathryn!

And happy birthday to Ninja George!

Edited by author 04-17-2005 07:55 AM
We rock (well, she rocks...)

Ninja Kuitenbrouwer's new book, The Nettle Spinner, gets a killer review in the Globe. The first of many, I'm sure.


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Bookninja gets some bumph

The old grey mare gets the once-over at TDR. Ah, gal, yeh shine up nice.


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Ninja signs off on working vacation

I won't be posting much, if anything, this week because of other obligations, including: writing a couple articles, a massive job interview and moving to Toronto on Friday. So I leave you in the hands of Darbyshire and Kuitenbrouwer. May god have mercy on your souls.


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The Amazon graphic at the top of the front page now points to a general "Literature and Fiction" directory at Amazon.ca. If you're intending to buy some books and want to help Bookninja out (but don't have the time, cash or inclination to donate through PayPal), click on this link first before you start shopping. We'll get a cut of each book you buy. The more books bought, the bigger our cut becomes.

Remember that all the money goes to contributors and site maintenance.

Thanks!

G

Still sick, and cry for help...

Sorry for the lack of posts. I'm a walking nasal drip. I've ceased to appear human in any regard and now look like the fluke man from that freaked out Xfiles episode where the guy gets sucked down the outhouse, like that so freaked me out, man, I could never possibly go to the cottage again and... wait... what am I saying? Ah, the NyQuil... Yah, ride the wave, baby! The wave. The whale. Did you guys see the movie Whale Rider? So this trippy kid is like "I'm dancin, I'm dancin, I'm doing what my daddy don't want," and then she totally rides a whale...

But seriously, if you happen to know of a good, reasonably-priced two or three bedroom apartment in Toronto (house, non-smoking, near subway, and preferably in BWV/High Park, Parkdale/Roncesvalles or Annex areas), please let me know. We're jumping ship from Guelph. Nice town, but sloooooow. If you find us an apartment, you get a free Bookninja T-shirt.


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Ninja appearance

Because of the nature of our trade in shadows and secrets, it is more common that you don't see us ninjas out and about. That will all change tonight though, as ninja Murray appears at Harbourfront in Toronto to host an International Readings event featuring Gary Geddes, Paul William Roberts, and Jessica Warner. 7:30pm, Brigantine Room. Hope I see some of you there.



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Edited by author 03-01-2005 09:37 PM
We've been to the powder room

And have some minor touch ups to show for it. Why didn't anyone tell us we had broccoli in our teeth? I wondered why you were licking your teeth so much.

We give you The Bookninja Magazine. A space not unlike those that came before, yet wholly different in that we intend to keep it updated. So far we have included the articles to date from 2005 as well as this new piece from Kevin Chong. Upcoming will be more articles, reviews, Bookninja TV episodes (we hope), and assorted pieces of e-phemera.

In case you're wondering, all the old stuff is still here, just the clutter is hidden. Combining the old "Books" and "Essays" columns into one new column called "Magazine" allows us a cleaner look and a slight squeeze to pull the entire page into view for people who insist on using monitors set at a Lego-sized resolution (Pacman is dead, people, let's get with the times.)

We thought it might be nice to start with a clean slate, so we've moved the aging material off to archive pages for Reviews and Essays/Rants (permanent links to these pages at the bottom of the Magazine column).

Want to write for the new magazine? Send us your ideas. Want to "work" for Bookninja? Send us your resume.

Our PayPal donation jar (upper left corner) is now working with credit cards, so please try again, if you had trouble before. Also, remember to visit our advertisers, as they're the ones who are paying for all this new material. And lastly, if you're thinking of buying one of the books we talk about and you do it after clicking on one of our Amazon links, we get a percentage of the sale. Coming soon will be a page of all the book links we've made, so you can browse and make your choices there.



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Haha! The redesign will mostly be to accomodate a recategorization of our existing articles and make a venue for our upcoming articles.

It won't look all that different, but will navigate somewhat differently.

G

I say keep the little bladed throwing devices that look like luminescent breasts!

A redesign! Sheesh. I applaud efforts to keep sites fresh and all that. However, I prefer to visit sites that feel like a well lit home, so I can get what I went there for and leave without having to feel my way around.

I'm working on a redesign. Any suggestions?

G

Ninja notes

Indulge me in some (directly) personal news: my son turns two today. We had a little party for him yesterday that was attended by the pre-school literati set. Very swank. The crayons were new and sharp, the loot bags full of bouncy things, and the juice: apple, of course. Sniff. Little tyke is just getting so big...

And on a related note, the children of CanPo, including yours truly even though I feel old and look grizzled, will be reading on Wednesday at the Harbourfront IFOA in Toronto. Breathing Fire 2, an anthology of young poets from across Canada is launching at 7:30pm in the Brigantine Room. (I think that's where they keep the pirates.)

In the mid 90s, Breathing Fire predicted the rise of the careers of some of some great young poets (Carmine Starnino, Karen Solie, Stephanie Bolster, Michael Redhill, etc.) Breathing Fire 2 hopes to do the same for the generation born between 1970 and 1980. Please come if you can to cheer on us little ones. Noogies appreciated, but unnecessary.



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Har har, Shemmy. We don't reveal secrets of our friends' lives here on Bookninja... Well, we do, but we don't reveal secrets of mine. Shh. And shouldn't you be protesting the inauguration or something today?

George you're a total asshole! You know black people...biblically!

Ah, with those kinds of offers no wonder he, perhaps not all that fond of seasonal work, blew off the opportunity to polish my snowshoes.

How could my offer of working for a world peace org in the midwest compare with insulating an attic?

I'll throw in a dust mask! I think I have one left over from SARS.

What about the convelescence care I'll need when I'm dying of lung disease?

Can ya insulate my attic for less than 3 grand? Room, board and the odd wee dram provided.

Job hunting

I'm pretty much full time job hunting for the next few days, so my posts might be a bit lighter than normal. There's something about hurling resumes into the void that just turns me off all other endeavours. I may seem slightly more crotchety than normal. If this bothers you, find me a lucrative position within your organization. I do everything except windows.



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Hello St. Louis! Are you ready to rock?

The third airing of CSPAN's Literary Blogs and Their Influence seems to have brought more than a few new readers in. Please look around and drop us a note to say hi.



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Ninja field trip - permission slips for parents now available

We'll be conducting an excursion this Thursday morning, to see and film the Bibliotheca exhibit at Stephen Bulger Gallery in Toronto. Interested ninjas should apply to me here for more information.



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Speaking of which, I'll post on this later, but send me a line if you're seriously interested in attending a tour of that Bibliotecha exhibit in Toronto this Wednesday. We're going as a group with a video camera. Email me at george AT bookninja DOT com.

G

Anyone out there with my email address, could you drop a line? I seem to have lost my address book. I need you. I really do.

Note to Cliff, if you get this, I can't return to your earthlink address. I've been trying to send you a response for a couple of days. Send me another address I can write to!

Thanks,
G

Well Nin{ excuse familiarity}- had I been smart enough to figure out that you're Canadian I'd never have questioned you. I bow to your inate superiority. You say that Canadians self depricate- are you sure about that? I'll have to pay close attention. xoxooxoxoooxox Your ardent new fan. Janson

I don't think you're following. This is a Canadian site... We don't do the dem/rep thing. Our centre politics are left of your Left. And we spend nearly as much time on self-deprecatory humour (with a u) as we do on slagging America. It's just how Canadians make fun -- irony and subtle insult coupled with a mix of over-the-top silliness and passive aggression. That all said, welcome.

G

Bookninja darlin- I am "up north" and a dem. You want me to elect someone with a drive toward violence? hmmmm? hee haw - where's this humor you're talking about?

Welcome NYC: a brief tour

If you're here because you read the piece in Newsday, welcome! Take a look around. We have rants and essays, inverse omnibus reviews, comics. A word of explanation though: we run the show here with tongue firmly in cheek. Facetiousness is our stock in trade. This means we often make snide comments about places and things like Texas, Alberta (Canada's Texas), American politics, and ridiculous literary behaviour. We run the site as though it were part of the conversation you'd have with friends at a bar: full of jokes, exaggerations, and passionate declarations. Rest assured, when we portray Americans as slack-jawed Bush voters, we know full well most of you aren't. Especially you, dear reader of Newsday. If this were a link from the NY Post, well then.... It's all in good fun and meant to blow off a little steam until you elect someone with a brain as well as a drive towards violence. Consider it a loving shoulder chuck from your little brother up north.



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George says in his post that he was pleased not to be talking to someone from Texas. That's the way I acted as a teen ager attending exclusive northeastern schools. Fortunately I became educated and grew up- let's hope george will too.

Happy Holidays, my shadowy children.

Back in the next couple days.

G

The quicktopic posts are little screwed up today. I have a call in to the tech guys about it. Please bear with us.

G

Warning! Warning! Entering Holiday Mode! My hooks are flailing wildly!

Just like we did last year, the Ninjas will soon be slipping into holiday mode - a somnolent state marked by periods of drunkenness, bloated abdomens, and fist-clenching induced by association with family. This means that from sometime this week until the start of the new year, posting will be light and/or sporadic. There'll still be new material, but just not as much and not so reliably often.

Look for (hopefully) a couple new features before the end of the year. And remember to check out our new store full of crazy gift items. You may even want to treat yourself! Who couldn't use a shuriken-spangled thong? I personally guarantee these items will make you a god among men (note: this is not a guarantee.)



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I'll see what I can do, Twinks.... I'm working with a limited selection here. I may have to print the black t's myself (as they comprise the core of my wardrobe), so I'll look into fuzzy bunny slippers (with deadly shurikens, of course) when I do.

G

Edited by author 12-10-2004 02:23 PM
Of course I'd like Bookninja socks and slippers to silence the footfall at colonies, but the store offers no footwear.

Ok ninjas, for Giftmas I would like a personalized Double Shuriken Women's Tank Top with Twinkle on the back and a signed copy of your book. A chapbook would make a nice stocking stuffer, so don't forget to throw one in the package.

Your Giftmas dilemma solved!

Check out the new Bookninja store. Aren't you tired of being a book geek who doesn't kill things? These shirts and assorted items are everything but bullet proof. And a small portion of each sale goes toward paying future Bookninja contributors. (We may tinker with some of the design over the next couple days, so let us know if there's anything you're looking for. Inexplicably, they don't seem to have black T-shirts. A crime against Robert Smith to be sure.)



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That's a very good point, and easily doable. We haven't done that because, generally, I find popups of any kind to be highly annoying. Anyone else want to offer an opinion?

G

I don't know from colours, but if we're talking revamping...is it possible to have the links open in a separate window? Sometimes I wander so far from the home page that the back button is near useless.

Puce and lime!

Does anyone else hate this colour scheme? But I don't want blue and orange. Any suggestions?

G

/m37:

For Macs it's Shift+Apple+3 for a screenshot or Shift+Apple+4 to select a section for an image. Place a .jpg suffix on the resulting picture file and you're done.

Hey guys,

After looking at the site from several different computers down here, I see that some of our design elements don't seem to translate to every computer in ways I intended. If you're a regular reader and have a few extra minutes, could you send me a screen capture of what you see? Here's how you do it on a PC (don't know for macs):

Open the front page
Hit the "Print Screen" button in the top right of your keyboard.
Open something like photoshop or MSPaint
Go to edit > paste
Save the file as a jpeg if possible (or a bmp, if not)
Send it to me as an attachment at editors@bookninja.com

I'll look at it when I get back. Please include what browser you're using.

Thanks.
G

Leaving you to the devices of a madman

Hey kids, I'm headed to NYC for the next four (blissfully childless, though I'm sure I'll miss him) nights - in part to appear at this Melville House sponsored blogging event at the Housing Works Bookstore, and in part to salvage my flagging book of poems. Look for me living the bohemian life in the Village. Nudge me if I don't have my cheeks sucked in far enough. Seriously, if you're a New York ninja and can make it, the event looks to be grand (quite a group of personalities from some great sites: Maud Newton, Bookslut, Moorish Girl, Beatrice, and Moby Lives), and I'd love to meet you. I'll be the guy with the beard and glasses and accent, eh? So, until Monday night, I leave you in the iron hands of my partner, herr Peter Darbyshire - known to schoolboys everywhere as Commandant McStrappenheiny. He'll be watching over the Stalag and knows about the radio in the teapot.



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Snazzy new look! What impeccable taste.
What kind of images can we upload without bringing down on our heads the wrath of Bookninja?

Any comments?

Upcoming Ninja appearance

New York readers, and wealthy, idle Canadians, are invited to join me on December 3 at 7:00 pm at the Housing Works (126 Crosby Street in Soho) for the taping of what's being billed as a lit bloggers "summit". I'm not sure when it will be broadcast but I'm told it will be on American book tv (C-SPAN), and is sponsored by Melville House and the Housing Works Bookstore Cafe. Said summit will be a talking heads kind of affair comprised of the proprietors of MobyLives, Maud Newton, MoorishGirl, Bookslut, and Beatrice. We'll be discussing the new media of blogging and its affect on the world at large as well as on our own miserable, vole-like lives. Watch this space and CNN for further details.



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Re: The Once and Future Ninja

Wow, big changes!
Gonna pay writers, eh? Hmm...
I can see my essay titles already:
"From the Twink-tank"
"Twink Aloud"
"Twink Straight"
"Twink Twice"
"Come to Twink of it..."

Oh, you love it! The timing was eerie. Just as I posted something, it shut down with a grinding groaning noise. Oh well, off to the farm for a turkey feast. All that tryptophan should calm me down some. Say, did anyone else read Derek Weiler's editorial in the last QQ? What he said, man, well put. Here's hoping the sky stays over its rafters and the rodents steer well clear of the raptors.

Oh good. I thought I was being kicked off Bookninja in a slow-death kind of way.

I guess I'll just stare at GEC's comments on m'stuff :)

I think CHB's indignance might have melted a server. Zach, the trouble you cause me.......

I'm looking into it.

ci. pro'lems

Is anyone else getting stonewalled when trying to open the publishing quicktopic board? I consistently get an error message, just for that topic.

Please let me know.

G

Update coming late today. This aft, est.

G

Edited by author 08-29-2004 07:12 PM
/m20
geez, how long must our eyes bleed?

Edited by author 08-13-2004 10:04 PM
Paul!:)

Happy Birthday, Ninjas!

It's the withdrawal I fear...

Will payment be retroactive? :)

Ninjas in the August wind...

Well, Bookninja turns a year old on August 11. To celebrate we're making a big piņata of Wubblewoo and encouraging people to bat at it with swords. And it won't be papier mache. I can't wait for the treats.

For much of August though, we'll be in low profile mode, scheming for the fall. We're still planning the Bookninja party (free beer!), but for a time when not everyone is at the cottage. Think September. Cooler evenings, hot days, and drunk ninjas littering some hip Toronto neighbourhood...

We're also working on some changes here which will hopefully culminate in the unexpected ability to PAY CONTRIBUTORS. Yes, you heard it. Having come this far on a shoestring (a ratty hightop one, too), we're feeling pretty grateful to all the people who have donated time and brain cells to participate. But now it's finally time to live up the responsibilities we hold other editors to (many at knifepoint). It's a relief, in a way, to go legit. We'll let you know.

Now this doesn't mean we won't be posting Hearsay, Review and Essay, just that we won't be pursuing them as actively. Some days everything will look normal, and other days it will look like The Rapture struck and we were sucked up to Heaven with the other saints, leaving you heathen sinners here on Earth to have your eyes bled out by Jesus. Think of it as a low activity cycle. Something mellower than Terror Code Yellow... Like Terror Code Aquamarine or Plaid.

Anyway, keep checking in. We'll be around. We'll just be doppy with heat and soaking our tabi boots in the kiddie pool.



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Yes, just yanking your chain. There's an update coming....

wut???
we're both talking about the first anniversary party, right?

Yeah, I made no posts that night. I may have added something the following day or Sunday morning...

Patience, Twinkers. Paaatience.

re /m6
anything come out of this?

I gotta get some grant apps in line, so probably no posts tonight. I may add something tomorrow and/or Sunday morning.

The Wellington people are game and very kind. I have to decide now between the weekends of Aug 13 and 20th. Probably a Friday night. The other option is early September. Any ideas?

G

Actually, it's Wellington, which is the only beer I drink right now. Their SPA is delicious. That's how this whole thing came up.

Thanks for the input guys. I'll call them tomorrow and get back to you with dates.

I say do it. Of course it'd be all the better if it happens to be a beer you genuinely endorse.

Free beer is good. I'd click through a dozen pop-ups for a pint--okay, okay, at least two dozen. A 2-4 of pop-ups. (I think votes of the selfless kind carry more weight though, unless it's legal to send a beer through the mail. Probably not--probably you'd have to pour it straight into the envelope...)

/m9
A short term small ad seems harmless enough...but please make sure the free beer is drinkable. Creemore!
A friend gives me her underage son's beer stash whenever she finds his new hiding place...Molson Golden eeeeeewwwwwww. Kids today...

It's an open deadline, Ingrid, until you see a new logo appear.

Please wow us!

Not so much a soul at stake as a wee chunk of liver. I say... buddy, give 'er! (And this is a perfectly selfless ballot, since I won't, alas, be able to attend.)

Re: Seeking Shadowy Illustrator

When's the deadline?

A tastefully small ad is fine, so long as the beer isn't from a major conglomerate. I've sold the soul for free beer before (for an art vernissage years ago) and it didn't hurt too much.

Reader Poll

Bookninja's first anniversary is fast approaching (Aug 11) and I'm hoping to throw a big party in Toronto. I have a brewery interested in sponsoring the event (read, FREE BEER), but I suspect they're going to want something in return. Perhaps not, but I was wondering how you readers would take to a tastefully small ad on the site for a period of about a month. Pete and I have never hoped to make a dime off this thing (in fact, we lose money on it), but I thought it might be nice to thank you all for tuning in with a great big party. Free beer is the only way to go. So before I enter into negotiations, what do you think? If it comes down to it, should I sell a smidge of the soul for this? Post your thoughts in the discussion area here: (discuss)



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Seeking Designer with Shadowy Illustration Skills

In anticipation of a tastefully small line of Bookninja merch we're looking to rejig our logo and were hoping one of you would do it. So let's have a contest.

We want something that would look cool on either a T-shirt or a thong, something you might see sauntering hiply about in Williamsburg, Brooklyn or on Queen West, Toronto (said sauntering involving the T-shirt only, most likely). We'd like to keep two ninjas in cool poses, but somehow incorporate a book or books into the look. Send your entries to us here (preferably as a manageable jpeg -- we'll come looking for high res files later) and the winner gets $100 and some free ninjawear. Also included is the goodwill of much of the North American book community. You NEED this gig, man. (Note: if you've ever sent me spam about logo redesigns, you're automatically disqualified from this contest. And I've been keeping track.)



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Two-Four, Eh?

It's a holiday here in Canada this coming Monday, one in which Canadians coast to coast gather under natural settings to engage in rituals such as a the quaffing of golden libation and the adding of meat to flame. So Bookninja will return on Tuesday with regular links, new comics, and fer sure fer sure fer sure the Matthew Sharpe review. It's almost done. I swear. It might even go up over the weekend.



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Ninjas Away Until Monday

Families beckon. Rabbits hop. People are crucified. Angry angels passover. So posts may be sporadic, but that doesn't mean you can't sauce things up on the discussion boards. We'd love to hear from you, old and new alike. Heck, especially if you're new to the site. Drop us a line. And don't forget to send us your caption for our Litterati contest. Take a look at the blank panel here and suggest a witty caption by emailing us here. Be sure to read all the old cartoons first to get a sense of what's what. We stop counting entries on Saturday and will judge it Sunday. Check back Monday to see who takes the pot of gold (Fine print: yellow M&Ms may be substituted for actual gold.)



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Hey, yo. I'm headed to New York for a week. I leave you in the now capable programming hands of Ninja P. Direct all questions and comments his way.

Obviously there won't be a Litterati this week, but when I get back I'll post a new caption contest panel so that those of you who missed out on the last one can get your funky funny on.

G

Attention Winninjapeggers

Hey, Winnipeg Ninjas, it's time to step up and perform your duty as a (virtual) card carrying member of this ragtag band of balaclava'd superheroes. A schizophrenic book lover has gone missing in your frozen berg of a town and the authorities need help finding him. This is real. Normally I wouldn't advocate cooperating with the authorities, but the guy is a protected under the Bookninja Booklovers Statute of Reciprocity. That is to say, we'd find you if you were missing.



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