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Edited by author 07-02-2003 12:46 PM
Always look at the bright side: it could have been vodka-fueled diarrhea erupting from your body instead of vomit. It was bad enough that everyone knew you'd tossed your cookies. At least the airlines offer barf bags--there are no such provisions close at hand for those whose bowels spontaneously combust. Imagine completing a transcontinental flight with a load of butt-spew soaking through your seat and flowing down the aisle. You'd have *really* been able to witness the reflexive gag effect among your fellow passengers as the ventilation system circulated the odor throughout the cabin. Imagine the prolonged misery of everyone aboard, but especially your own shame-filled despair. There'd be no kindness or pity--only disgust and hateful glares from your cabin-mates. All you'd be able to do is sit in paralyzed horror until the plane touched down, and even then you'd have to figure out how to exit the plane, navigate to the baggage carousel, retrieve your luggage, and wash/change in a public restroom. Maybe one of the flight attendants would give you a blanket to wrap yourself in, but what if that aroused the suspicion of the security staff? There you'd be, surrounded by humorless people with guns drawn, and all you'd feel is the malodorous squishiness pooling in your shoes.

Surely some variation of this nightmare scenario has happened at least once in the history of air travel. I don't think "indignity" would come close to describing the experience.

There, now don't you feel better about it all?

Welcome home. We missed you.

P.S.: Great pictures.

"santa monica" and "caught kiss" are the two pictures that define, for me, the part of LA you visited.

I'm with shrimp on the reflexive gag thing.
"What's going on next to me is SO awful that I've momentarily lost all control of my body."

Here is a little story that should make you feel slightly better about your plane incident.
I was in LA on a bus filled with Germans headed to Universal Studios, when my best friend sitting across the aisle from me,leaned over quick, like she is needed to tell me something. I leaned over to hear what she had to say, BUT unfortunately, I badly misinterpreted her body language - as she had nothing to say, but instead puked all over me.
At first it took a few minutes to register what had happened to me. It was wet & warm and I was frozen in awe. Suddenly reflexes cued in and I started to feel the puke well up in me and I began to dry heave. I jumped up and started to head down the aisle toward the front of the bus - I guess I was looking for an escape route.
I was dry heaving the whole way and Germans were cringing, swearing in German, and pushing each other as far as they could against the bus away from me. The Bus driver seeing my dilemma, pulled over the bus .... luckily by a Jack in the Box where I jumped off the bus and got some fresh air, and happily did not throw up.
However, I had a new problem - the bus was not about to turn around and head back to the hotel so I could shower & change my clothes, so I went into the Jack in the Box bathroom and cleaned off as best as I could. Then I climbed back on the bus to continue the ride to Universal Studios, having to face irritated Germans, and my laughing friend.
At Uinversal Studios I bought a new shirt (with my lunch money), but I had spend the rest of the day as a pariah.
So Brit. feel glad you didn't puke on someone, believe me it ruins their whole day.

I've always wished I could buy one of those 3-d puzzles from the sky mall mags. Something about them entices me.

Oh, poor Britt. I feel your pain. I myself am a frequent and copious vomiter, and in fact have used those sick bags in situ more times than I'd like to recall. But if it makes you feel any better, you should know that there is something more embarrassing than vomiting on a plane, and it is drinking too much free wine on top of a couple prescription pain killers, getting up in the middle of the night on your transcontinental flight, and passing out (with a loud thud that, according to one flight attendant, sounded like the landing gear coming down) in front of the lavatory. Oh sure, you come to with an oxygen mask in first class, and you get all the oj you can drink, but at what price?

"Who are these people . . .?"

The same people that buy low power electric drills and steam cleaners off of late-nite tv. In other words, my mom.

Man, in my college days (you know, last year?) I had a quite a few night before/morning after fo-ups . . . in Mavis' bathroom before we drove to Long Island . . . in the empty apartment next door (so clean!) . . . on somebody's tree after a pint of Mellow Corn (there's nothing mellow about it, to coin a phrase).

So, who's for Gimlets?

Hey robo-vacumes are the ideal bachelor device...!

Sky Mall is kinda lame....ok really lame

I have a confession to make. When I read, "The poor guy in the row next to me started to reflexively gag," I laughed very hard. I'm stifling laughter right now so my co-workers don't ask what is so funny. I guess I'm a bad person? I don't know, that image just tickles me. I'm sorry.

"All at once I was wretching and crying into a tiny bag in front of like 200 people"

when you going to loose it, you might as well let open the floodgates. who needed all that excess liquid anyway?

awww baby girl! I know how horrrible it is to throw up.. I would rather lose a limb!!! There is just something about your body forcing up food and beverages that should have been digested and changing them to a orangy-pasty color and it all coming back out your mouth and sometimes your nose.. Not to mention the cold sweats and hot flashes.. dear god.. its horrible.

I feel for you.. But your alright now.. No more cheap vodka for awhile I would presume!