When I lost Grace suddenly a few summers ago, I cried myself to sleep every night for three months. As the grief wasn't lessening in that time, I tried to figure out what else might be going on. Since I live alone, it turns out that on top of the grief of losing my best friend, I was plain lonely. I was starting to forge relationships with the spiders in the bathroom! When I got another dog, I still missed Grace, but I began to heal.

I say all of that because sometimes if we're stuck in grief over one thing we can't make any progress toward healing because underneath there is unresolved grief over something else added in. We focus on the thing we're conscious of while the other stuff keeps us from moving forward. With all the losses you've suffered recently, I wouldn't be surprised if your grief isn't a combination of all of them.

While you will always miss Ninja to some degree, you might be most helped by sitting down with your husband and looking at the fears surrounding his cancer and the feelings around the sudden death of your uncle. That may be your block. Imagine Ninja seated beside you with a paw on your lap, wanting you to feel better and know that the God who is now caring for him is also reaching out to you.

July 15,of this year it was 2 months since we said goodbye to our German Shepard Ninja, It feels like yesterday. It hurts so much.He was our baby.We cant have human children and when we got Ninja at 8 weeks old he became our baby.He was more than a pet.Since I hurt my back nearly 4 years ago he was always by my side when i hurt or lost my balance or just making sure i was ok. The 15th would have also been his 9th birthday. i have pictures of him all over the house,but i still find myself bursting into tears or calling his name.
  I thought having his ashes here and knowing for sure what made him sick would help but it hasnt eased our pain.We founf out for sure a month ago he had Kidney Cancer.MY heart and gutt still say it was the canned food but cant prove it.
   I would give anything for one more day with him. I know time heals all wounds but I am begining to have my doughts. My family has been delt one bad thing after another in the past year. Before we found out my husband had prostate cancer we couldnt figure out why Ninja refused to leave his side.A week after getting the news we figured it was his way of telling us that there was something wrong.New years eve we found out my Unlce whom we are were very close to died suddenly. I try to keep telling myself that the good lord doesnt give us more than we can handle,but loosing Ninja is more than I can handle. I never thought that it would hurt so much. i feel like I am loosing my mind,
  Will my heart ever heal?We have changed alot of what we used to do.Not having Ninja here makes it hard to do them. We love the outdoors but spend barely anytime out there now.
   I know my boy is waiting for us on the other side,but it dont ease the pain.Does anyone have any suggestions on what we can do to help ease the pain so we dont go completely crazy.

My boxer, Paul, died at 15 yo last august. We are still greiving. My only consolation is that I know I will see my boy again real soon. Donna

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Diana, even though I am faced with losing the MOST precious beinging in my life, my dog Angel, I do beleive that we will see out good friends again on a different plane. It helps me when I think of loosing Angel on this earth....but, Angel and I have a bond that is out of this world and I do believe that when we connect with a creature on this earth it is not different than connecting with a human. You will see each other again. Hang in there, I know what you are going through and will be there shortly. KM

Hi, I am new here, my dog Angel has been diagnosed with an aggresive form of nasel cancer. She has only a few months left to live. She is my world, my best frind, my partner, my kid......my everything. I am devasted. KM

Hi Diana,

I am sorry to hear about your cat. Why don't you visit the Animal Chaplains website and post about her? You can send a photo or just write in the guest book. Others who read it can offer their love and support.

Please know you are being thought of with love.

Nancy Cronk
www.AnimalChaplains.com

Dear Diana: My prayers and thoughts are with you, as I read your story my heart ached for you. Wee Whimpy is at the Rainbow Bridge. His wings match his fur and he is getting used to them. He has food and water, toys and friends. He is ok....talk to him Diana he will hear you.

Darlene

I'm so sorry to hear of you losing Whimpy!!! You are wonderful for taking care of him. I bet he was a sweety! I have felt the same loss when my 18 year old kitty, Precious, had to be put down. It was 2 years ago that I found her having a seizure and then the vet let me know that she had an enlarged heart. It was so hard to make that decision and I still miss her! Keep talking about it...it will help the grieving! Whimpy loved you and knew you loved him! You'll see him again at the Rainbow Bridge!
God bless!
Sheri

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I quess I just feel better talking about it.One of my cats passed away totally unexpected 3 days ago.Whimpy was born here 10 yrs ago by a mom cat we took in (pregnant) We named him Whimpy because from day one he was a cry baby.About 2 yrs ago. He decided he wanted to live back in our woods. I dint' see him for a couple of days and went looking for him. I dont know why he suddenly wanted to live out in the woods but he would't come home. (about the same time a spayed female we had and him had become good friends and she sudddely disapeard,) We think maybe a cyote got her. Anyway I convinced my husband to put a house up for him near the woods.I put nice blankets in it for him and would go out every day, sometimes 2 times a day and bring him food and water. (filled his bowls)And we would sit and talk a few minutes. I would always say "Whimpy you know you CAN come home" FInally after 2 yrs. this past NOV. He started comming home. So I set up another dog house on my porch for him. He stayed practicly all winter. I thought maybe he was getting artherits thats why he was comming home in the colder weather. He started to stay in his (summer house ) a couple weeks ago. BUt would come home at night. He was here on Wednesday night. And I went out and coverd him with a light fleece blanket as it was a little chilly. The next morning I saw him out by his house . But I was so busy I didnt get out to visit him untill about 10:00 but he already left. Ididnt think much about it as he has done that before. So I just filled his food and water bowls. I called to him, But I did not see him. I figured he must have went out for a while , he would be back later that day. We had just finished dinner and I was checking my email , when my husband said "Whimpy is here" I ran to check on him as he ususally came home a little later . When I went out to him he was on our patio about 5 ft. from our door. He didn't look right. I could see his face looked a little swollen and his eyes were kind of shut. I grabbed him up and brought him into our laundry room, I told my husband he looked like he had heat stroke. He didnt believe me , I got some ice and a wet wash cloth and started to cool him off. He seemd so restless. I coulnt calm him. Then he started panting. And I knew he was in trouble. I had a cat die just 3 months before of heart failure and he looked the same. I got really worried. I called a vet, It was 7:00pm We live 40 mins from a vet. and No one was open! I felt helpless and hopeless. I could do nothing but comfort him. By 8:30 He was dying and so was I . He put his paw up to me to hold and all I could do was cry and tell him I loved him.
I can hardly believe he's gone. My husband and Daughter used to say I was nuts to go out to the woods to take care of that dumb cat. But I felt a special bond with him, And I know he did with me also . Thats why he came home when he was dying. I miss him soooo much..!!I keep hoping Ill look out my window and see him.

So interesting site, thanks!

I'm really impressed!

While this board will remain as it is, I have just started up a new social networking site for animal lovers. Join for free and post a profile on Gotta Love 'Em at http://gottaloveem.ning.com. You can post memorial pictures on your profile, pictures of animals you still have, videos, or whatever. I'm hoping it can be an even more supportive way of communicating, and it gives us a chance to share the good along with the sad.

I know the pain of the loss yall are going through. I had a yorkie named Buffy that I loved dearly. We got her when she was only 6 weeks old and had her to love for a little over eight years. She passed on January 1 2006.I was away visiting at my mothers house for the first week of January and when I came back home my father told me that buffy had passed. They said that she had an enlarged heart and lots of fluid around her heart. It was really difficult for me because they did not tell me untill a week later that Buff had passed away, so i never got to tell her good by and how much I loved her before they took her off of iv's and everything that was helping her to survive and put her at peace like the rest of my family. I was really upset because I had always wanted to bury her in the back yard at my mothers hose where she would love to run and play. They didnt do that. They left her to the er vet clinic. I will always lover her. she was my life. I hope she knows how much i loved her and how much i will always miss her. I still think of her all the time and her memory still brings tears to my eyes. Every day that I had with her was a joy. When i was sad she would come run to me and bark for me to pick her as if to tell me she loved me. Momma loves you baby girl. I miss you a lot and always will.

I'm sorry for your loss! We all understand, that's why we're "here". I lost my Precious kitty 2 years ago and I was just crying about her the other night. I had lots of guilt, too...but I'm over that! I know I did my best for her. She was also 18, had her as I became an adult and on... She was a black Persian and my favorite memory is of when she would cuddle on my chest, close to my face, purring, and lean her nose out and sniff, seemingly waiting for my kiss. Then after I would kiss her nose, she would seem to relax further.
You also did your best for Nikki. She knows you loved her and she didn't care about the rest. Keep sharing your grief, it helps. God bless and remember the Rainbow Bridge.
Take care,
Sheri

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I'm so sorry to hear about your loss! Your Ninja is in a better place now and no longer suffering! I understand your feelings, I had to make that dreadful decision a couple of years ago when my Persian kitty, Precious, she was 18, had an enlarged heart which was causing it to be difficult for her to breath and she had a couple of seizures that we knew about!
It's so hard, but it was the only loving thing you could do!
Hold your memories tight and know that the love you shared will carry onto the Rainbow Bridge.
God bless!

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On may 15,2007 We had to put our beloved German Shapard Ninja to sleep The day before the Vet told us his kidneys were failing and his prostate was enlarge. There was nothing they could do for him. We brought him home that day. The next day I could see the pian in his eyes and made the very painfull choice to let him go.
  i feel so guilty. My heart and home are empty. he was my protector and friend. We had him since he was 8 weeks old and for nearly nine years he filled each day with joy and suprises.After injuring my back 4 years ago it was me and him home all day.He was mommy's boy til daddy got home from work.He was spoiled rotten but i wouldnt have it any other way.
i need some help how to I ease the guilty and empty feeling? I have other animals that are missing him too they arent acting the way they normally would. I have spent the past 2 days in tears,my eyes hurt so bad but my heart hurts more.
 i try to sleep at night holing one of his favorite toys for comfort, Am i normal. i would give anything to have hom home again.
We decided to have him cremated and bring his ashes home.Any help or suggestion would be greatly appreciated.