Edited by author 03-21-2003 12:22 PM
Yup .. your post reminds me how selfish I can be. I notice this especially after I post a comment on someone's blog. Sometimes I jump into the conversation without regard to others. PUSHING data instead of helping to grow knowledge.

I don't know whether this cultural though ... ? Maybe young or inexperienced at nurturing other's ideas.
Reading this post is a start for me to change. Thanks Ian!

chriskk
http://radio.weblogs.com/0118995/

I think it's not just Americans who converse one-sidedly, but maybe we started the art form of "waiting for the other person to speak." Isn't that waht we learned in school--wait your turn to talk?

I try to listen. But it isn't always easy. Especially when the person I'm talking to is boring and I'm full of my own brilliant ideas and tangents. Heh.

Edited by author 03-22-2003 11:13 PM
Hmmm, reading your posts I feel I might be too quick to single out America. Other cultures probably share this tendency. When I think of my interaction (me representing American culture) with my Japanese friends (them representing Japanese culture) I guess I start to ignore the larger context. The extreme opposite in communication tendencies between Americans and Japanese make it easy to lose perspective, and gets me thinking down the dichotomous road of "Americans are loud, Japanese are quiet" -- which is oversimplification. Anyway, any culture has a variety of communication differences within it, because we are in the end all people.

Along the same lines, one thing I have been struggling with lately is the idea of protesting. While I respect the passion of people willing to get off the couch and do something, it seems similar (if I can modify kristen's quote a tad) to the "wait your turn, then yell" school of communication. Is it possible for progress to come from this, and is it sustainable without a change in base-line understanding of the motivation and feelings of both parties?

I posted a comment to Anti Celebrity's journal about this subject recently
http://www.deadjournal.com/talkread.bml?jo...thread=26415#t26415

So yea, my question is what the hell can we do to listen to each other more?

Reading this post is a start for me to change. Thanks Ian!
I can't tell you how much you've just made my day ^=^

Hey Ian,

I hesitate too to try and pinpoint differences to culture. I have noticed, though, that although I'm usually a blab mouth, I seem to be more comfortable with silences than others when I'm in America. Again, I can't compare with other places, so I end up saying 'America'. But I have no trouble letting a conversation end naturally and have silence.

When in groups, it's interesting to see who feels the need to start a new conversation first. I've grown up with the thought that when a group conversation dies down, it means a ghost is passing through. So I usually end up fantasizing/wondering what kind of a ghost might be among us...while others might be restlessly trying to come up with something witty to say.

I dunno. Interesting posting.

I am often reminded of my own ignorance practically every time I attempt to argue a point I'm passionate about. I've been noticing that despite the fact I keep myself informed on topics, I am constantly overwhelmed by the scope of opinion and magnitude of passion people have behind thier ideas.

I think protests breed anti-protest mentality. I know in my group while we joke about being YES IRAQ WAR, we are really just retaliating against what we believe to be ignorant people just going with the flow. I think thats why there is such a great divide in opinion. There isn't enough exchanged between the two sides, and thus everyone on both sides gets steeped in a kind of political dogma that they can't imagine living without.

I feel like I always get the most out of conversations where both sides take time to consider the ideas and opinions of the other. Like everyone has been saying, its time to get away from the "wait for your turn to speak" mentality.