Right i'm back been workin hard checked out most of the messages.....and well i'm glad i can give ya somethin to talk about..yes i did roll a 996..just one of those days i get them once a yr even good bowlers bowl bad sometimes and i'm no exception.but they are few and far between. But i guarantee i'll bowl more good series than bad over the yr.
  Well seen all the rymes we've had everyone swoppin spit here ..i dont want any unless its from a woman LOL
Just one more thing you'll get a prize if you can find a word that rymes with ORANGE

Confused border dweller,

I hold the full O/S 1961 boundary maps which go into detail, so you would have to tell me exactly where you live even the street if it is applicable.

Sorry folks I havent laughed so much in ages, after reading the valentine poems on here (I nearly fell of the computer chair). Phil, you must admit you walked into that one. Poet - I hope no one gets offended as I'm sure you dont mean it by the way you *** out the words. Has anyone got better ones....and keep them clean...lol.

Mal.

Well you see I was trying to keep it clean - but ah well -failed again lol.

roses were red
when I saw a mandarin
if you find our cat
will you please hand 'er in

OK OK so that's BAD - but a manderin is an orange MO - honest

Edited by author 02-01-2003 07:38 PM
Nice tribute to Mike there Poet (cough cough try not to choke laughing)
I think we should have votes on Poet becoming the official forum poet laureate.
Well his are a lot better than mine anyway.

I believe he is now taking commissions for writing Valentines for anyone less poetically minded - queue here folks and no pushing in ok

Phil A is quite correct by saying that it was my choice not to play for Lancashire
And let that be an end of the matter, and if you have something to say stop hiding behind false names !!!! and maybe you can say it to my face. My so called "home centre" is Blackpool not Wigan

A 'Super Bowler' called Mo

Dropped a bowling ball right on his toe

The air turned to blue

When it bounced off his shoe

As he needed that spare for the DOUGH !!!

This is the super bowler called mo
who dropped the ball on his toe
he may have missed the spare
but what does he care
cos he he came back with six in
a row.
and what do you know
he won all the dough

Poet,

I think you just got beat by Mo!

Mo - I seem to have had a memory lapse, can you remind me how many points you have got in the last 2 weeks on a Monday night???? Against both Blackpool Prem Teams. lol!

Yes it was a good one, I must admit.

Lets have a competition ! I write four lines, you write the last. Then we can all vote on the BEST.

A Blackpool Drag Queen called Beth
Got caught in the loo with our Jeff
When she dropped to her knees
Jeff shouted...YES PLEASE !!!!!!
????????????????????????????????????

Edited by author 02-03-2003 06:06 AM
A Blackpool Drag Queen called Beth
Got caught in the loo with our Jeff
When she dropped to her knees
Jeff shouted...YES PLEASE !!!!!!
Can you polish my shoes with your cleth


 translation - Cleth - posh version of cloth

Phew - keep it clean lads

A blackpool drag queen called beth
gor caught in the loo with our jeff
when she dropped to her knees
jeff shouted...yes please
did he call off the wedding?...who???....SETH !!!!

(i think thats what they call Jeff's future father-in-law

And for the Chairman, so he won't feel left out....

A Video Porn Star called SAL
Got into a clinche with BIG Mal
When they turned on the tape
She Shouted......IT's RAPE !!!!
???????????????????????????????

Answers on a post card please (or here) and send them to Lancs BTBA

There once was a Chairman called Holmes,
Who had a fetish for Gnomes
He was datin a girl called Winona,
until she whipped out a 10 inch boner.

Roses are red
Voilets are blue
Mo dyes his hair
and gets spares too.

A Video Porn Star called SAL
Got into a clinche with BIG Mal
When they turned on the tape
She Shouted......IT's RAPE !!!!
and up popped jeff in a thong and a cape!!!!!!